Looking Behind The Covers

She

2012-02-15T16:47:00.001-08:00

she's beautiful, cheerful and wonderful in her very own way.

her laughter is always there.
her 'hyperness' is something you can't miss out
her smile is the best you can find :)

she's tough and rough :P, in her very own way

her presence is always strong
her bossiness is something i had to live with
her commands are the funniest i know

she's strong, love to sing songs but not so long. (i'm talking about her height! Haha)

her ideas are always fun
her passions are what i share
her worries are the least i know.

she's loving, torturing and caring, in her very own way.

her joy is always contagious
her actions speak louder than her words
her favour with kids is her special gift.

my sister is a lot more than i can describe.
i can only say that it has been a privilege, an honour and a delight to have her as my sister.

yes, we fight and we disagree, we laugh at each other and pick on each other.
despite that, she's still my sister and will always be :)

happy birthday! I know this is mushy and the both of us have never been like that. but yeah, i will be mushy for once since it's your special day. love u! :)

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Turn to you

2012-02-12T07:31:00.001-08:00

when I don't know where I'm going to, at least I know that I'm not alone.

when I don't know what my destination is, at least I know that it is planned out.

It has been a long time since I dated Him, a long time since it was just the two of us.

I stood at the balcony, and there was our date.
it was simple yet good enough.
He spoke while I listened quietly.
I spoke while He listened quietly.

'see that building in front?'
'yeah'
'you don't see anything beyond that, but you know that there are buildings, places, destinations and dreams beyond this building.'
'yes' I said under my breath, looking at the opposite block that was the only thing I could see.
'that's like my plan for you, you don't know what's the bigger picture if you focus on something else. Look up..'

I looked up and saw the blue sky. I forgot that despite the things i couldn't see behind the building, I could still see the sky that stretches endlessly. Nothing was big enough to cover the sky.

I was still able to see God. in fact, God was still above me and with me in spite of everything.

I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes.

'From now on, will you look at me instead?'

'yes, i will'

thank You Lord.
You know each tear that drops.
You know each heartache I feel.
You know it when I need you the most.

You are always, always there. =)

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moments like these

2012-02-01T19:43:00.001-08:00

a moment is the most beautiful..
not when a sky is touched up with grotesque clouds and birds flying across it as the sun releases its rays on earth..
it is.. when you have a close friend with you to take in the scenic picture.

a moment is the most overwhelming..
not when people shower you with a thousand compliments that you have never imagined receiving...
it is.. when someone tells you that you have made his life different..

a moment is the most touching..
not when you watch a romance movie of a guy sacrificing everything for a girl or anything else that makes a girl cry..
it is.. when a friend tells you that it is such a blessing to have you as her friend..

a moment is the most breathtaking..
not when you get the best results among everyone and receive the honour of having high achievements.
it is.. when someone tells you that he believes in your ability to be the best.

a moment is the most encouraging..
not when your hard works produce good fruits and you know that it has not gone to waste..
it is.. when God tells you that He is still proud of you when things don't turn out as well..

a moment is the most precious..
not when you receive the gift that you have always wanted and dream of..
it is.. when your beloved friend believes in the God that has made your life so special.

thank God for moments like these.

His love has made every little thing so much more beautiful.. that includes my little life =)

dermarian memories :)

2012-01-27T20:15:00.001-08:00

'poof', the lights went out.
We stared at each other, expressionless. 'oh', was all we uttered. It's not like the absence of light was going to change anything anyway, we were chatting within our own group while the teacher...well.. Let's just say that he was giving us our frequent break during class. 'you all can do whatever you want to do, as long as you are not too noisy,' he always said. So, we ALWAYS happily did our own things---talk.

Then the light bulb moment came to me. Like the moment when u do a 'noodle dance' and you suddenly gain an outrageous idea. Not to say that my idea was outrageous, or that i did the 'noodle dance'.

So yeah, i think that day was some time after the mooncake festival. I was 14 and my level of hyperactivity was high due to high intake of glucose. Jokes! Back to the story, I saw the office chair with the broken seat, and thought of an idea to film something cool! (i THOUGHT it was cool) Ernie, as usual became my actor/scapegoat. He obediently sat on the chair and allowed me to twirl the chair around the room by holding the bottom of the wheeled chair whilst crawling on the floor. 'camera!' i directed and wh took out his fancy phone (it was the best among ours back then XD) and jy who has got the same phone shone the scene with her fancy 'phonelight'!

I seriously don't remember what zc was doing but i think he was busy with something. Sm and cp were our faithful audience who tried to hold their laughter throughout the whole process while Ry used her awesome mobile phone (hers was always the best too) to play the titanic song. The background music kinda failed because it started too late and there was dicapro talking for like a few minutes at the beginning XD

everyone practically rejected my idea, at first...
But then, i think everyone kinda got hold of the thrill of it while we were recording behind in the lab.

Oh I haven't told u the idea have I? Well, the idea was to put ernie on the chair, push him forward, backwards, sideways and the main point was to film only his body! Not the chairrrr, so that ernie will look like his flying to the moooonnnnn. But the camera man wasn't professional, so let's not blame him :P

Anyway..
Back to the crawling part.
So i was tugging the chair to the side, to the front while i tried my best to hide myself from the camera, and ernie did his part. 'Act like you're flying!' i shouted into his ears. He certainly did more than that!

We did only one take.
But let me tell you, it was the best take ever! XD only because of the last part! :P you watch yourself.

I had to ask for permission from ernie to show this.

Forgive us people, we were only 14.

We were half insane. :P

All my friends from Derma, i miss the times we had together, hopefully this post will bring back the sweetest memories to u all. Because while writing this, all i thought of were you people :)
It was disappointment that not everyone was back this time, but i still miss you all.

I love..

2012-01-27T08:09:00.001-08:00

the reason that I love to plug those earphones into my ears is because during my worst moments, whenever I'm sad, disappointed or angry, music is my stress buster :P or at least that's how i like to put it. You seriously can't be angry when u listen to sentimental songs u know.

I just realized that I listen to music more than I drink water. Haha! so don't be surprised if u see me wearing my headphones/earphones half of the day, most people might not know it, but listening to music is one of my favourite hobbies. in fact, it's my favourite language. :)

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Your hands

2012-01-26T07:25:00.001-08:00

I got down from the car, took the hand and held it in mine.

then, we walked towards the restaurant together.

The restaurant was chilly, i stared at my nails that turned purplejust as expected. We giggled as we noticed goosebumps rising along our arms. With my hands sandwiched in between hers, we rubbed them to warm each other's hands.

when my hands got warmer, I took hold of her hands and she happily exclaimed, 'your hands are warmer!'

Her palm is probably half the size of mine.

I always wanted a little sister.

so that i can hold her hands and tell her, 'everything's okay, I'm here for you'

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my dream piano

2012-01-08T21:59:00.001-08:00

One hand holding Starbucks, another holding my file and blazer, i walked down the street in my black pumps, feeling my feet ache in every area. I trotted up to a shopping complex as the weather got warmer and instantly stopped outside a piano shop. 'Steinway' i mouthed the words, then stared through the glass. A man just finished a piece and ended the song with a beautiful touch. Everyone in the shop applauded, he smiled and gracefully stood up from his seat, subsequently showed the customers other pianos. I did not intend to enter the shop at first (because it was too high classed) but i instinctively push the glass door forward to enter. I gently brushed my fingers across the grand pianos as i weaved in and out between them. The man seemed to notice and walked towards me. He asked,'are you buying a piano?'. I was stunned for a while but decided to just answer him honestly, 'i'm just looking'. Surprisingly, he happily led me to a grand piano and asked if i wanted to try playing it. I quickly nodded and there i was, sitting in front of a grand piano that probably cost more than my house. I carefully placed my hands on the piano, then i started playing a song in g major, my typical style of music. The piano sounded great, i never heard such clarity and richness to a piano. Tell me about it, i fell in love with steinway right away. I didn't realize that everyone stopped what they were doing and listened to me. When I finished, they clapped and started asking me questions. I was startled but i was happy too because the man then allowed me to play any piano i wanted to try. After trying out 3 grands, I felt bad for not buying anything. So, I left my contacts and told them that I will buy a piano after a few years, which i told myself, steinway it is, when i earn enough money.

But if not, i will remember that moment, when i had the chance to play the awesome grand piano. :)

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Blessed

2012-01-07T23:52:00.000-08:00

I hugged her, then him.

"thank you so much." was what i uttered before i turned my back and walked towards the departure hall.

I walked on and on.

Knowing that, I'm truly blessed and truly loved.

Thank you Lord for these 3 wonderful days.

lalala =D

2011-12-30T07:15:00.000-08:00

don't think there'll be one day when I stop loving music =)

I'm a huge fan of those two guys! =D

Random =P

2011-12-28T01:37:00.000-08:00

wow. 3 more days to new year! =)

guess what? my wish list practically came true, well almost.

My wish list:
1. ~~A small and pretty backpack~~ (saw a gorgeous backpack and mum bought it for me! weee!)
2. ~~a pair of good headphones~~ (my sister gave me one for Christmas! how sweet! and it's RED. so nice!)
3. A recording microphone (am saving for a good one now)

Thank you Lord!

heart of a princess

2011-12-19T07:07:00.001-08:00

I'm in the middle of a women conference, the noises of the surrounding, the chattering of women, the voice that is asking for attention.. They all slowly mute as my mind drifts towards the words i saw on the card just now. The verse floats in my mind, 'she smiles at the future..' proverbs 31:25. I suddenly recall a book that a precious friend gave to me on my 18th birthday. I never knew how and why in the world he chose that book but i fell in love with the book the moment i saw it. I still remember how it came in a brown box, with my name written on top of the slip of paper. My heart throbbed with excitement even as I slowly opened it. I have never expected my friends to trouble themselves to get me gifts but receiving that gift must have been the best part of my 18th birthday. This is only so because the book was a seed of love, hope and faith itself. The book had been a companion and counsellor as i went through the days in college. I marvelled at the wonder of being God's princess every time a sentence was read and a page was turned. I finally understood what being a princess meant, i also finally realize that a princess's dream is not that ridiculous after all. However, the happy ending doesn't just happen there and then. How quickly i have forgotten, how easily i have lost my heart in a not-so-fairytale-world when i was not aware.

I have let unpleasant consequences take over the things i had believed in. In disappointment that my life was not a fairytale, i stopped hoping in myself. Not that i have been acting any differently, but i had lost passion to be the princess God made me to be.

So, this is a note of reminder to myself and the princesses out there.

Princess,
Keep your head up high, but don't let your nose be the peak
Guard your heart, but don't stop loving unconditionally
Cry when you want to, but remember to wipe them away after that
Sing and dance when there's music, but do it for the Lord
Remember that you a princess, but the king is not yourself.
There are times when we feel weak, but we are made tough by His strength
They might not accept you, but God will always love you no matter what
They might say that you are good enough, but you don't have to be the best to be a princess

Lastly,
Don't ever forget to keep your princess heart.

They might laugh, but they can never be another you :)

I'm on my way home now. The soft music in the car and the conversation that is going on in front fade out as my mind drifts to a different tomorrow.

I shall hope. :)

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Happy Birthday Ernie!

2011-12-16T08:48:00.001-08:00

In the first year of primary school, we were placed in different classes.
Being a december baby, he had to be in the last.

We met when we were 8 but I do not recall being friends with him until we turned 11 and we were nominated as the model student candidates. I just remember teasing him all the way in primary school, then we made a deal to vote for each other despite everything. Now that i think of it, it's quite amazing that the both of us won the title and appeared on the same photo in newspapers. Who knew that those two students will become best friends a few years later? We grew up, we changed, i watched him growing taller and taller until he overtook me. Thank God, our friendship changed too, but for the better =)

Of course, the teasing never ceased. =P

He put up with the teasings, knowing that i spoke without thinking most of the time. He was patient when it came to my bad habit of revealing secrets that were meant to be left untold.

I thank him for still being my friend despite it all.

We tried to correct each other, we might have used the wrong methods and end up arguing. Nevertheless, there's one thing i know, we definitely learned something better, if not everything from each other.

11 years of friendship has proven to teach us many things about each other. What i've known, now know and will know about Ernie, will never change a thing about our friendship.

what is our friendship like?
our friendship is like he being my girl-friend and me being his boy-friend =)
if you get what i mean.
If I get a boyfriend someday, I think he will be the most excited guy friend of mine XD

Ernie is one friend i know who will always stand up for me, give me a helping hand when i needed it, listen to my every word and try to dig out all my secrets from me (not that i mind telling him anyway =P)

He is the kind of person who will scold another friend who has hurt my feelings, the one who will never talk bad about me, the one who will be truthful to me even though the truth is painfully true =P

Have i mentioned that he is also the only one who will fool around with me? =P I was always the video director with crazy and lame ideas and he would be my actor. Then we would take out our "illegal" mobile phones to record short clips of ernie falling from a chair, flipping his hair and singing and many more! Sometime along the our secondary school years, he stopped fooling around with me and suddenly proclaimed that he doesn't want to take funny photos and videos anymore. Anyhow, i still forced him to although it was so embarrassing. =D Those videos are still in my computer and they're so precious! =)

Ernie likes to tell stories repetitively, he told me the same stories like more than 10 times already all my life. Every time we meet up, he just have to tell us the same stories. there's one story that he loves and loves to tell anyone no matter when and where. haha!

He would grin saying, "you know the time when i told my mum that i was going to hang out with Chris, she would say nothing and let me go. But if it's someone else..." It always came out like a fresh story from his lips although i keep telling him that the story has rot.

But what to do, no one can tell ernie to stop telling stories he loves telling =) and that's what make him special.

oh no, i typed so much and there's still so much to say about my best friend XD

Determined, is one word i would use to describe ernie.

He is always focused and would always press on to finish the work he has begun.

He wants things done very well so he doesn't mind putting a lot of time in it. He is the one who studies smart and diligently although he worries a lil too much sometimes. That's why his results are so awesome =)

Now he's studying MUFY in Sunway College, after a few years, he will become a doctor who can flip his lab coat around in the future. haha!

AHA! most importantly, he can sing really well =) he has the dolphin voice (whatever you call that in English). No matter what other people say about him, Ernie will always be the talented Ernie i know.

I want you to know that I'm really proud of you dude =)

you have officially lived 18 years,

which consists of 6569 days. =)

I pray and hope that you continue to be the wonderful person you are for the days to come.
18 years of your life have been a blesssing to us.

today is your birthday, and i remember even thought u never remember my birthday =P

This is your birthday gift =)

I hope that this is special.

Only on your 18th birthday my friend.

love,

Chris

Looking Behind the Covers

2011-12-15T10:20:00.000-08:00

If they saw only the surface with naked eyes,

who will still choose to wait?

the one who takes time to understand the layers within,

proves to be faithful and forgiving.

Layers of the past reveal the truth,

but time is needed to reveal the layers.

If they assumed that the cover is hard,

who will still look beyond to see the delicate?

the one who is careful not to break the fragile piece,

proves an ability to protect and to preserve.

The cover may be hard,

But every heart still has a desire to be cared for.

If they knew the truth behind the covers

who will still choose to stay?

the one who learns to love the worst part,

proves to love unconditionally.

Love not only the good things,

But love, knowing the true meaning of it.

If they knew the broken parts inside

who will still continue to trust?

the one who believes until the very end,

proves to hope in the Lord for the very best.

our own strength might bring dissapointment,

But through Christ nothing is impossible.

Under every disappointment or problem,

there is a blessing in disguise;

despite every flaw or mistake,

there is still beautiful goodness;

if and only if, we don't judge a book by its cover.

10 wonderful reminders

2011-12-14T01:39:00.000-08:00

I read this on Celina's blog and was blessed. So here you go, 10 simple but meaningful quotes written by someone. I hope that you will be blessed as well =)

1] Prayer is not a "spare wheel" that you pull out when in trouble, but
it is a "steering wheel" that directs the right path throughout.

2] So why is a Car's WINDSHIELD is so large & the Rear view Mirror is so small?
Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE. So, Look Ahead and
Move on.

3] Friendship is like a BOOK. It takes few seconds to burn, but it takes
years to write.

4] All things in life are temporary. If it is going well, enjoy it, they will
not last forever. If it is going wrong, don't worry, they can't last long
either.

5] Old Friends are Gold! New Friends are Diamond! If you get a Diamond,
don't forget the Gold! Because to hold a Diamond, you always need a Base
of Gold!

6] Often when we lose hope and think this is the end, GOD smiles from
above and says, "Relax, sweetheart, it's just a bend, not the end!

7] When GOD solves your problems, you have faith in HIS abilities; when
GOD doesn't solve your problems HE has faith in your abilities.

8] A blind person asked St. Anthony: "Can there be anything worse than
losing eye sight?" He replied: "Yes, losing your vision!"

9] When you pray for others, God listens to you and blesses them, and
sometimes, when you are safe and happy, remember that someone has prayed
for you.

10] WORRYING does not take away tomorrow's TROUBLES, it takes away
today's PEACE.

my skies

2011-12-08T09:12:00.000-08:00

We were sitting at a familiar place, looking up to the night sky. I searched for the moon and the stars as usual but the clouds shrouded the whole sky. Breaking the silence, he said, "we must be able to be happy.... just by looking at the sky." I took it in and remained silent for a few minutes. After thinking through the meaning of the sentence, I replied "yeah", meaning it with all my heart.

now every time I look at the skies i will recall that very moment.

yeah =)

i must remember that...
I have a beautiful sky over me..
I have eyes to see the clouds, the stars and the moon..
God is looking over me, and be happy just because of that.

A new background! =)

2011-12-05T01:42:00.000-08:00

Yay finally a new blog layout! =D what do you guys think????

I spent the whole day just working on it.

it's not quite done yet but bear with this layout first kay?

I seriously love doing things like this =)

happy holidays everyone!

the tribute

2011-12-03T00:37:00.001-08:00

The title looked intriguing. I clicked the link and the first thing that caught my attention was the photo taken in my house. I smiled.

I actually didn't realize that the friend he was referring to was me until i read the part where he wrote about meeting me and... (i'm still gonna kill you for writing it so misleadingly)

I was in physics class. I peaked into my bag and started reading the rest of the blogpost on my phone while Mr Ala continued talking about magnetic flux. His voice slowly faded from my ears as i read on...

Every word, every sentence showed how much he cared about our friendship, it meant so much to me.
Truly, i was touched. 11 years of honesty with each other and the bond is still strong :) things have never been awkward between us, we blurted out everything when we had disagreements, we weren't afraid to reveal or talk about each other's weaknesses. In fact, i don't think we can even hide anything from each other. Although there were many things i have chosen not to say, i knew they knew. They have always known.

I do not deserve the honour he has given to me, the sincere compliments he has showered on me, but i know that i am truly truly grateful towards Ernie who has seen a lot more in me than just the girl who talks and laughs loudly in class. I'm not as good as what he thinks, but thank him. At least i know that, when i'm still trying my best everyday, my effort has not gone to waste. It is a pleasure and privilege to know that my nagging/advice/grandmother's stories/scolding/words of encouragement (whatever u call it :P ) have impacted them in any way.

The tribute he has given to me, i give the honour to God. Any good that's in me, comes from Him. :)

This post is not specially for u.
It's because i will definitely take time to write a better one about u :)

But i want to say thank you.

I don't know what do to either if we have never been best friends :)

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search myself

2011-11-29T18:09:00.001-08:00

I remember how friendster and Facebook used to have an 'about me' section. i remember how i used to stare at it and wonder what to write till i finally decide to simply type any random things into it.

i never understood how i could show myself, make people understand and know the kind of person i am through a write up like that. In fact, i never believed that it was possible.

but then, when i started blogging two years ago, i realized that i felt comfortable just writing things that i felt and learnt over the days. i could finally voice out thoughts that weren't easy expressing through words and found out that i was so much more than i thought i was.

much more complicated.
much more immersed in deep thoughts.
and much more flawed in ways that i did not like.

back then, my close friends came to me and told me that they see sides of me that i do not usually show from reading my blog. It made me realize that i might have been only showing them one side of me, without reminding them who i really am inside.

it's not that i turn into a different person when i'm with them, i just did not bother showing them the weaker part of me, the quiet side of me and the concerned thoughts of mine.

i try to swallow a lot of things. i say 'it's okay' all the time. i tend to think it's all my fault when things go wrong. sometimes, i really hate myself for not being perfect, for making people distant away from me.

i spend hours, days, weeks, months thinking about how everything went wrong. then, I turn numb when I start forgetting about how those things once mattered to me. it's like running away from problems until they fade away.

i know that swallowing all these makes me really tired. but i do not want to make a big fuss. at the same time, i do not want to leave it be. i do not know what to do and i do not want to run away this time. However, i want to try my best to be better.

it's only possible because i know that God believes in the small me to change, having His support and strength. Not only that, He sent people to correct me even as they hope for the best in me. they see things that i do not realize myself, be it the good or bad traits of mine. they remind me again and again, that I have something more in me than i have always thought of myself. More importantly, they forgive me for my flaws to love my all..

thank you :)
for being honest all the time.
for believing in me and hopefully will still do, for the days to come.
for a second chance.

I promise, i will try my best.

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2011-11-20T00:49:00.001-08:00

'Do you know that i used to dislike you?'
I laughed. 'i didn't know that, but i'm guessing it's because i'm noisy?'
She nodded her head and giggled.
'which class?' i asked.
'all classes. You are always so loud and your voice is so high pitched. I couldn't stand it at first. ' she exclaimed.
I smiled. 'then what happened?'
'i got used to it, and i like talking to you, because you never seem to worry, always so relaxed about everything.'

But of course, I worry too.
There are times when i worry a lot.
Anyhow, i have came to a point where i decided that worrying is not gonna do me any good. So when my mind drifts to worries, i tell myself to stop.

Surely, why worry when our God is so great? :) we need to be reminded daily that worrying brings us nowhere.

Honestly, i didn't think that i will be this close to her either when we first met. Knowing her for a longer time showed me more of her, and i learnt that people can be so different, yet still be friends. Good friends. Best friends.
When i learn to love them just for who they are, despite their differences and weaknesses, then i start to adapt and tolerate willingly.

Being different is not an excuse when things don't turn out right. Maybe it's time to look at our hearts to see what's wrong.

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vision

2011-11-14T21:27:00.001-08:00

The life i want to live..

Is the best life that i can live.

The best i can give as a daughter, a friend, a student.

And in the future.. As a partner, a mother, a dentist..

Always hoping, praying and believing for the best. And only the best in everything that has settled and those that will come to pass.

This is my dream :)

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today

2011-11-13T04:20:00.001-08:00

The day just got worse when we were on the bus. It started to rain heavily and i felt my faltering voice being covered by the deafening sound of large rain drops beating incessantly on the bus's rooftop. I didn't know what to feel, too many things going on, too many things i have been guessing all along, too many things i never knew. Now that i knew, I felt like i wanted to breakdown and cry, then hide in a hole.

But no, i'm not that delicate.
I looked around myself and saw my friends and family who supported me all the way.
All of them who loved me for who i am, even when i fail, again and again to be a much better person. They offer listening ears, shoulders to cry on.. Anything i needed :)

Besides, daddy's message gave me strength today. Simple and sweet. Knowing he is out there helping people just makes me so proud.

Then, i have friends who would just listen as i talk about anything, anytime, anywhere.

Many times, i don't tell them what i have been going through just so that they don't have to worry. I have came to realize that i can, i really can go through things myself. It's just a matter of choice. I have learnt that, i have to stand on my own feet.

And no, i'm not alone. I have Someone. He goes through everything with me and He made me so much braver and tougher than before.

Because of all of them, I cannot breakdown.
Because of all of them, I'm feeling so much better now.
I know, they are the most afraid to see me sad and quiet. I guess, i don't want any of them to worry. And they don't have to, because I'll be fine.

I really want to learn to face problems on my own, not just resolving by tearing or ranting, but taking up the responsibility and proving that i can be independent.

From now on, it's just me and Him, against all the odds :)

Oh Lord, thank you :)

Oh did i mention that the sky cleared, birds chirped and sunlight shone through the window after i woke up from my terrible nightmare?

The day will get better. :)

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resolutions, no not for the new year

2011-11-06T06:13:00.001-08:00

1. Eat an apple everyday to ensure smooth defecation. What?! I used a scientific term already. Okay i actually want to keep the doctor away.

2. Sleep early and wake up early! (this would probably never happen)

3. Keep my room tidy and clean :) it is now!

4. Eat breakfast everyday. Good for the functioning of brain! Seriously. My mum always says 'how to think with an empty stomach?' so trueeeeee!

5. Stop playing my guitar when i'm studying. So distracting. :O i also should not sing at the same time.

6. Remember to call my parents as often as possible.

7. Eat my food before they expire or have fungus growing all over them. But of course, i still eat them after they have expired. I'm still alive.

8. Remember to keep my friends in prayers. I always forget :(

9. Crack more lame jokes and make my friends laugh. Haha :P

10. And oh. Maybe stop going to the foyer and talk -.-

I'm convinced, i can do these.

At least half. ;)

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oh worries.

2011-10-27T02:30:00.001-07:00

honestly speaking, I have never been confident with my performance everytime i step out of the exam hall. I have always came out remembering every little mistake i did and every question that i didn't know how to answer. yes, i'm always smiling and joking before exams but after that i will be so drained because i will think that i did badly, which sometimes is true. i'll see my results and go.. 'Ahhh i knew it.' but sometimes, it's the other way round. just when i think i did badly, i get a pleasant surprise by knowing that hey, i actually did quite well, unexpectedly. Then my friends will say that i'm a big fat liar because i said i didnt know how to answer the questions. Well i was telling the truth, but of course i still tried to finish everything. i still remember how i worried about almost every paper after every exam during Spm. thanks to discussions after exams, u get to know how many mistakes u did. and hey, those are the worst stuff u can get into after exams---adds up to your worries! :( but i can't help it. sigh.

now it's coming back to me! let's just say i haven't given my best so far,i wonder happened to my brain. i can't think during exams. :(

anyhow, it's over. i can't do anything. right?

i can only leave the rest to God now.

come on Chris, you can do better than worrying :O

can't believe i'm debating against myself on my blog.

oh Lord, once again i want to commit everything into your hands.

if He can work wonders with me last time, He can too, now.

1 more month to go!!

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hope

2011-10-13T00:00:00.001-07:00

Am closing my eyes, hoping for a better day.
I know, i can't let go yet.
I know, i can't just give up yet.
I know, You are here with me.

Don't have to fear, don't have to worry, don't have to face it on my own.

I know and believe that it has been done.

Thank you Lord for a beautiful day ahead :)

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contented no?

2011-09-26T01:10:00.001-07:00

I eyed the number plate of the taxi and compared it to the number on my phone. Realizing that it matched, i quickly walked towards it and got into it with a soft 'sorry'. The Chinese taxi driver asked in cantonese whether i received the message, i replied yes hoping that he wouldn't start talking to me in cantonese. Well, having limited vocabulary and inaccurate intonation, i don't want to embarrass myself. Surprisingly, he just played some Chinese oldies on his stereo and was quite quiet.. Until someone called. Then he started talking loudly about something which i don't remember now for i was trying very hard to sleep in the car. I do remember thinking whether his set of teeth was complete though. he tend to mumble some words, and daddy told me that old people's bones will disintegrate slowly, that's why their teeth fall off, and start mumbling. No offense! Just stating some facts here. I felt my stomach stir. 'Augh, must be that soya bean drink. ' I thought. The trip back to sunway became very nauseating, i tried very hard to ignore the carsick feeling i had again. Almost reaching, i told the uncle in mandarin to drop me at the side gate. He seems very appalled and claimed in mandarin 'oh so u are a Chinese? I thought u were a malay!' yeah, i was dumbstrucked too. I didnt realize that i was that dark. He further asked what i have been doing until i got myself so tanned. I told him i have always been dark, thinking about how i only stayed in college lately and how my whitening facial wash had no effect. Then, he started talking about getting study loans from the government after he found out that i was a college student. Strangely, he kept persuading me to get a study loan, he chuckled saying, 'get a big sum of study loan! Then don't come back from overseas, don't need to return the money!' i cleared my throat and squeaked,'have to return if we borrow lahh' in mandarin. he nodded his head, and said 'of course of course.' he went on saying that even if i didn't need the money,i should still borrow from the government. The complains about their unfairness continued. I kept quiet not to interrupt his speech, pondering why was he so into receiving loans.The taxi gradually slowed down in front of the side gate, i bid him farewell and got out of the car, glad to be free of the carsick feeling.

I walked to my apartment, realizing that i didn't agree with the uncle at all. Surely, why fight for something that someone else needs more than u? Time to be contented no?

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2011-09-05T05:16:00.000-07:00

1 day left! =D
I don't want to leave my blog rotting again. so here i am! =)
I don't feel like writing a long post, so I'm just gonna write random stuff okay?!

1. I've been listening to kina grannis the whole day =D ahh so nice!!!
2. I wanted to get my art projects from school but i forgot again. oh well!
3. I finally finished an art project this holiday! haha! cause my sister was leaving so i had to work fast.
4. I still haven't finished my drawing =.=
5. I have to say, i love going to the clinic with daddy =)
6. Shermaine has been faithfully hanging out with me for the past one week. She was a great company =D
7. I miss my sister. =(
8. my mum left this afternoon!
9. oh well, i'm leaving tomorrow anyway.
10. I don't wana go back?!
11. I composed a few songs but.. haha i didn't record them. so yeah. you know what happens, i don't remember them already.
12. i love my piano, can i bring it back to sunway with me? =D
13. my hair is short!! i look like a china doll. I think I already told everyone that.
14. oh well =) doesn't matter. Shouldn't care what other people think =O

September 2010

January 2011

imagine my hair was this long once upon a time!

August 2011

now it's like this. haha! hmmm...i think i might just like this hair style more and more. =)

2011-09-02T10:53:00.000-07:00

I never understood why I have always been that careless and forgetful.

within 1 year, I lost my camera.
within 2 weeks, I lost my new spectacles.
within 3 hours, I lost my new dress.

one day, I wouldn't be surprised if I lost myself.

sigh.

I should really stop day-dreaming.

yes i know you're wondering why i am still so vain =P

ah well, this is the last SS photo taken with my camera which i happened to save in my laptop.

memories memories..(btw, this is taken in England?! adds up to the picture value!)

I've learnt my lesson alright.

keeping your dreams alive

2011-08-11T08:33:00.000-07:00

I felt a need to write about my experience with the refugee kids even though i'm so tired now =)
I just came back from an outing with the Sunway Christian Fellowship members. We went to a learning centre just to spend time with the children and to bless them with what we had. There were games, singing, a sketch and sharing session and food =D I really enjoyed myself as much as the children did. Trust me, they were extremely excited, happy.. and LOUD. Thank goodness we didn't tear the whole place down. haha.

This is my second time but I still didn't know what to expect. However, I was very excited about this trip since last week. =P As I was preparing my heart for this session, I decided to go with what I've learnt all these while, knowing that there's still so much to learn on dealing with children.
Throughout the session, I was just being myself, trying my best to know the children a little better. Anyhow, because of the difficulty of understanding their language and they understanding ours, we only managed to talk a bit. Somehow, there are always new things to discover in every little thing happening around us. I came to realize that communication doesn't just happen verbally, the eye contact, the smile, the gestures and signs you put together to make communication possible, they all count.

I didn't even realize that I've been smiling all the way through. It's so true that the greatest joy is found in giving, not receiving =) Giving what God has given to me to the children, be it love, gifts or assurance, certainly made life so much purposeful to me. I know that if I ever grow weary one day and ask myself "what am I doing this for?" I'll know where to find the passion for this dream of mine.

when the children were asked to draw out their "dreams", I'm amazed by the dreams they have and believe in, big or small, they all mattered to them =) most importantly, it came from their hearts.

I have a simple dream too. Seeing every smile that appears just because of a simple task I do makes everything worth it for me. however, just by dreaming alone is not enough, I hope that this aspiration is kept alive, that I'll go for it, even by stretching myself further.

Before leaving, the children came running to me and gave me high 5's
remembering something I learnt from the last experience, I looked into their eyes and hugged them.
"good bye"we said, but I hope I left something behind, just by showing how much we loved them.

I gave my drawing of a princess to her. She smiled, grasping it with her tiny hands.
"keep your dreams alive" i wrote beside my drawing.
yes, keep your dreams alive.

the kampung style

2011-06-12T21:17:00.001-07:00

my feet was aching... and getting more and more painful every passing second. 'do u think its okay if i just took off my heels and walk around the shopping mall?' i asked him. 'i guess its okay since the floor is made of marble.'

i instantly took off my cream-colour-heels, and set my feet down on the cold marble floor. holding the straps of my high heels in my left hand, i ran up to the front to catch up with my other friends. they laughed at the sight of me walking barefooted in a shopping mall. other shoppers stared at my awkward act.

a bit embarrassed, i placed my footwear into a plastic bag. 'now they will probably think that my heels broke or something.' i grinned saying. it felt so much better without the heels. i finally could walk without feeling the straps tying my feet so tightly that red marks stayed on the skin.

after all that, i still had to wear my heels when we went out of sunway pyramid. so, i realized that wearing something that Im not comfortable with for church service wasn't practical at all. so no more heels unless Im forced to wear it. oh well. what to do?

as kampung as i can be, this is me. :)

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cognition

2011-05-30T09:11:00.000-07:00

i flipped the pages and found familiar drawings across the lines. i stared for a while, trying to remember whether those doodling belong to... "i drew this?" i asked her. "yes!" she grinned, her eyes forming two crescents.
i'm touched. the book was full of my sketches, things she asked me to draw every time i go to visit. From time to time, she will ask for a variety of things, ranging from princesses and houses to food and jewelries. Her happiest moment is when i show her her requested "item". her sister would be as excited as her, awed by those little things i drew that i didn't even think were nice.
"did you learn to draw in england?"
"umm.. no.. never learnt." i stated as i tried to concentrate drawing some fruits she wanted.
she giggled saying "i'm very happy today" i smiled.
i turned to her sister. "do you like to be happy or sad?"
"happy.." she mumbled. "then why do you want to cry everyday? you should smile. like this." i tried to convince her as i showed her a balloon i drew. it had a smile on it.
she smiled.

yet i know, deep inside my heart, things weren't that simple.
i should have went to visit more often when i knew that her sister has been crying almost everyday since the chinese memorial day (ching ming jie).
i could have been more caring.

now, everyone's wondering what's wrong.

we all know that only one thing can change that.

we are all praying..

Jesus, will You touch her heart with Your love?

on the way back, i felt a strong passion in my heart, a confirmation instilled in my spirit.
i held my breath as i envisioned my future, a vivid one.

i finally know which path i am to take.

plans for this holiday =)

2011-05-23T03:42:00.000-07:00

now i can finally ditch the textbooks!

it's time for a meaningful and artistic holiday =D so i've decided to..

1. draw something! any ideas?
2. learn how to play the guitar well =)
3. record some random playing, just like always =D
4. compose a song maybe?
5. do some craft work, am still thinking.
6. design my own dress for koko sze ern's wedding. weee!!!
7. finish reading my novel =)
8. bake, bake, bake!!
9. hang out with my friends everywhere =D

things i've done...

1. bake an ice cream cake
2. hang out with my besties in my best friend's house
3. learn different guitar strums from youtube.

it's just the 2nd day =D there's more to come!!

im loving it!!!!

the kampung style childhood (part 1)

2011-05-21T05:22:00.001-07:00

it was drizzling. i was holding my balloon above my head as we headed to the gate. 'do you know how to play with balloons?' i asked him. 'you can actually play with it?' he responded with a grin. 'what?' i gave him an awkward look and laughed, hitting my balloon upwards. i watched as my golden balloon came down in the sheets of rain, then i swung my hands to hit the balloon into the sky. repetitively, i did the same thing, chasing, hitting and laughing until i was worn out. piece by piece, my childhood memories came back to me. its still a wonder how a simple game like that made me laugh so much.

i remember how we used to have so many balloons in church after celebrations. that was when my besties and i will toss the balloon to the ceiling of the church and start playing this game we'd created, 'never let the balloon touch the ground'. the game gets even better when there are more balloons and you are not allowed to let any of them fall to the ground. we liked to run around carrying our colourful balloons tied together in a string. the greatest thing that could have happened to us was getting floating balloons! we never knew that they were filled with helium gas back then, so we called them the flying balloons. however when we brought them home, they didn't really mean anything anymore, without our friends to share them with. as kids, we were always fascinated by simple things. we made balloons into balls, apples, water bombs, tummies and anything else we could think of. we knew all the weird ways to burst a balloon. while most of my friends liked to pinch, poke or sit on their balloon to burst it. i always preferred the 'green way' of doing it, which is by releasing your balloon on any patch of grass. and wala, u will see it burst so gently and softly. okay this is not entirely true, but still, at least u don't have to waste energy and it will definitely burst because the tip of a grass blade is sharp. :P Haha! just explaining so that you won't think that I'm coming up with weird theories. Ahhh.. balloons. i can never leave them out of my childhood memories.

he released his balloon and it bobbed around. taking turns, we hit and kicked the balloon so that it will not touch the ground. we were like two crazy kids playing with their balloons in the rain. fancy how a balloon made us laugh so much.

that's when i realized that I still have the child i once was in my heart.

my childhood is precious, as 'kampung' as it can be. =)

have you ever wondered?

2011-05-10T15:07:00.001-07:00

We wonder how imperfect some people can be without looking at ourselves first
We wonder if we could ever learn to love someone's imperfection despite everything
We wonder when will we stop focusing on someone's flaws when it is the hardest thing to do
We wonder why.

We wonder if human beings are made like that
We wonder how far should our patience and love go in a bounded world
We wonder if there should be a day where we tell ourselves that its enough for us to bear
We wonder when.

We wonder if our hurts buried have been gone by time
We wonder why when we are agitated we pull the past out of our sacks and reveal them
We wonder of the meaning of forgiveness when we aren't sure ourselves whether we have really forgiven
We wonder what.

We wonder if there is a solution to all of these
We wonder if there is a perfect world made of no tears, no pain, no sufferings
We wonder if there is a way out of our own imperfection that caused our anguish.
We wonder how.

We wonder if we search hard enough we could somehow someday find the truth
We wonder of the places that we can hide and lock our secrets deep inside
We wonder if we are ever at the right place when everything seems so wrong
We wonder where

We wonder why are there so many questions when we know the answer
We wonder why our eyes are obscured by our selfishness all the time
We wonder how high should we climb, how fast should we run, how hard should we try.
We wonder how much faith should we have, how much love should we give, how much hope should we hold.

Perhaps its time to stop wondering.

We all just want things to be perfected but we always fall short. Only in the perfect one, we are perfected by His love.

Pray.listen.obey.

Never stop loving,hoping and believing.
When our Dad gives us instruction, He is in charge and nothing will fail us! :)

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Change

2011-04-26T08:08:00.000-07:00

fingers on the keyboard. eyes on the blank column.

i wondered what to type as i let my inspirations sink in.

everything seemed so familiar for a while. my occasional blogging, my "loitering" on the internet, and my good old friend's text messages.

then i'm suddenly struck, i'm no longer the girl that i used to be a few months ago. no, don't get me wrong, i'm still the same person you know who talks and laughs loudly for no reason, it's just that being in a completely different environment makes me feel very much different. i wonder if time had made me grow, people had make me wake up, places had made me open my eyes and surroundings had altered my approach to life.

i wonder if my old friends back home would look at me and say that i have changed. i wonder if i am too caught up with my college life that i tend to neglect some things back home. sometimes, we ask whether change is good or bad. by time, i've come to learn that change can be neither sometimes. it's not whether it's good or bad, it's just something bound to happen. anyhow, if there's no change, wouldn't that mean that we would be standing at the same ground for quite some time? or maybe forever?

asking myself whether i'm still the person i knew i was...

i've came to a conclusion whereby i'm certain that, i'll always be who i am and who i am made to be, striving for a change that would make me better but still very much my own self.

the beautiful thing about home =)

2011-04-03T09:47:00.000-07:00

i looked up and saw twinkling stars embedded in the cloudless night sky.

i smiled.

i remember staring up to the sky every night, hoping to catch a glance of a shining star. Just one, it would be enough.. however, there was none. i often end up in disappointment because i simply couldn't find any in the kl night skies.

i watched the stars a little longer.

they glimmered like diamonds scattered across the dark sheet of endless sky.

i kept them in my heart, knowing that it will last me for a while =)

Ocean

2011-04-02T10:27:00.000-07:00

It has been a long time since i last recorded my own composed songs. most of the time I'll just simply play them (like i always do) and before i knew it, i would forget what i played a few minutes before!!! then when people come asking me what song i played, I'll just stare at them blankly and tell them that i have no idea either =.= well that's because it's totally random! it's rojak playing my friend said.

a recording phone would really come in handy, too bad my phone crashed. =(

i can't really record any videos now.

this is my last recording. i kinda liked it because it's not really the typical kind of music i used to record =)

okay it's still my style, but it's a bit different from my other compositions right? =D

i compared this to my early recordings and I'm glad to say that I've improved. yay!

random fact:

dad heard my recordings because i played several on the computer. he commented that they were nice and i should send them to my friend's aunty who's a very good musician. he even said that i should insert lyrics into my melody to be performed in koko's wedding. cannot lah, those songs aren't meant to be sung =O

maybe i should work on my brothers' songs now =/

i desperately need a recording hand phone right now!

randomness during the wee hours

2011-04-01T14:39:00.000-07:00

because this is a random post, so here's a random photo.

hehehe

found this picture in mum's lappy!

rhu yie snapped this before i left for college =)

ahh..can't believe it's already April.

time passes like the wind =O

by the time you become aware of it, it's gone.

so i should stop sitting in front of my mum's lappy.

anyway,

perlis is flooded, again.

but it's great to be home.

pebbles and shiro smell horrible.

they need a bath, seriously.

my house smells of paint.

my room is now purple.

my bed is dismantled.

i just realized that i have loads of homework to do.

and i haven't touch anything except the television and this lappy.

i have to study for 2 tests.

i have a scholarship form to fill in.

i owe my accounts teacher a meal.

i'm gonna attend a wedding dinner, i love weddings!

I'm so gonna dye my hair. =D what colour?

I'm gonna get a new phone! weee!!

i can't wait to meet my buddies!!

and.....

i should really get some sleep now. O.O

Gifted

2011-04-01T13:59:00.000-07:00

i was looking for the card reader when i opened the drawer and saw the shiny gold medal lying on a pile of papers. flipping the front of it to the palm of my hand, i read.

"4x400 METER P1"

i smiled as i thought of those days, running on the field under the hot sun. i missed the feeling of racing for the medal. i remember getting bronze and silver medals but gold was a rare case. somehow, there would always be someone faster than me. somehow, there would always be someone better than me.

a few years ago, i wouldn't have thought of getting any medals at all, i wouldn't have thought of appearing as the top at all. gazing at the medal which felt surreal in my very own hands, I'm reminded of the results i got last week, another gift, like that medal. over the years, I've received so many gifts that just came like surprises from heaven. =) indeed, I've achieve more than what I'd expected, let it be academics wise, sports or anything else.
many people asked how i felt after getting my results. i was really happy and satisfied. =) what's there not to be happy about? but what's there to be proud about? I'm thankful that God has blessed me with good results but if not for Him, i would never be able to do it. so right here right now, i want to give all glory to God. For my achievements are not of my own.

some also asked about my absence when our spm results were out. no photos on the newspaper, no personal interview, it seemed like i missed out a lot. Anyhow, those publicity didn't really matter, i don't want people to know more about myself, i just want them to know how good my God is =)

the best part of my results? it must be making my parents proud =) Knowing that they were very happy for me and being able to help my dad save up a pretty big sum of money for my pre-U course, it was a greater joy than getting perfect results =D

praise God for everything.

Everything I'm able to do, is a gift from Him.

...for we worship the giver but not the gifts.

things that made me smile =)

2011-03-25T11:57:00.000-07:00

1. hugging the cowie soft toy that cynthia, florence, shirley and xin wei bought for me as my birthday gift!!!! i love it =D
2. shopping with florence which resulted in empty purses, but overloaded bags. hehe. but it's just once in a while!
3. finally being able to update my blog again, thanks to someone =)
4. getting decent results for my spm =D
5. being able to spend time just chatting with my best friends back home.
6. jamming with my "bandmates" in the power studio and doing some crazy stuff. =P
7. flipping to the front page of my precious book and seeing the words of my own handwriting, which reminds me of everything sweet.
8. receiving smiles out of gratitude when i told them about the free parking tickets given as a blessing to all.
9. being hungry and knowing that there're people who emphasize that sharing is caring, that i'll never go hungry =)
10. knowing that God's plans for me are always the best. No matter what it is, He's good all the time =)

The Big-DAY

2011-03-10T01:20:00.000-08:00

2nd of March.
Birthdays are meant to be beautiful moments. at least to me =)

Cakes. candles. cards. cookies. care. celebrations.
Birthdays are made of nice simple things which warm your hearts.

Family. friends. homies.
Birthdays are never missed out by the important people around you.

God. gifts. gatherings.
Birthdays are discovering gifts, having nice gatherings with those who matter the most to you.

my birthday was a great day.
i really want to thank everyone who made it special for me.
i'm sorry that i can't really go into the details right now.

will update you guys on that, one day! i promise =)

10 facts about my blog

2011-02-28T00:29:00.000-08:00

HI! for once, i'm writing something very random about my blog and my blogging experience.

so don't read if you don't like random stuff! =P

Here's the 10 facts that you might or might not know! =)

1. i started blogging on the 6th of September 2009, and my very 1st post was a piece of memory. haha, i think that it's funny when i read it again. but hey, i'm so glad that i wrote it down, or not i wouldn't have remembered it!

2. i used to get very excited when people leave comments or messages on my blog.

3. i have so many drafts that i do not publish simply because i don't feel like letting anyone read them.

4. most of my drafts start with their titles and end with their titles too =P

5. when i write "stay tuned for part 2!" there's usually no part 2 because i would forget about it or i would be too lazy to write about it. well, except for a few posts. who knows? i might write the 2nd part one day when i'm inspired. aha!

6. i seldom upload photos on my blog because i'm too lazy to do it =/

7. i get very embarrassed when people read my blog =.= don't ask me why, i have no idea either.

8. i call you people stalkers for reading my blog but i posted my link on my facebook profile =P what a contradictory! hahahaha. honestly, i'm really happy that you people take time to read my blog =D (you know who you are)

9. when i'm inspired to blog, i rarely blog. when i blog, i'm rarely inspired to blog. =P

10. i have a private blog and you guys can't read it! BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA.

A good day without a bag =)

2011-02-21T02:35:00.000-08:00

i stared at the door, blinked my eyes, stared at it again and noticed that the padlock was hanging there, with the shackle engaged to the tumbler. "NO" i said under my breath, my housemate turned to me as she held her hair dryer in her hand, she then added very quickly "she just went out" too shocked to even think, i walked in circles a few times until i clumsily slipped my feet into somebody else's slipper and ran out. "Maggie!!!!" i yelled while running down the flight of stairs. when i reached the bottom of the building, i didn't see her anywhere. i sighed and wondered what to do next. my bag, my keys, my hand phone, my purse, my homework, my lab coat....argh!!! everything was in the room!

after being frustrated for a while, i finally decided that I'll just have to go to my roommate's class or attend class empty handed. so where's her class? i thought to myself and hated myself for not knowing where. oh well! guess i just had to go for classes without anything today. so i went back up to my apartment, wore my shoes without socks (my socks were in the room too) and went for class. on the way, i told myself to memorize my roommate hand phone number so that i won't be so helpless the next time.

i couldn't pass up my homework or lend my friends my book so i ended up explaining the whole story to my friends and teachers. telling them jokingly that i felt so "imcomplete", they actually felt very sorry for me and thanks to them, i managed to go through the whole day without anything! =)

this is because...

Miss vijaya kindly got me a rubber band to tie my hair, Miss Deborah and Miss Soo let me go for not passing up my homework today, and they were very sad for me when i told them i was locked out of my room. Xin Wei lent me money so that i can buy food and Sarah lent me her lab coat. the water dispenser came in handy when i was thirsty! =D how awesome is that! and thanks to my other classmates who allowed me to borrow their stationery and tear their books =P i didn't have to worry about copying notes and doing my homework.

by the end of my day, i realized that i can actually go to class without anything, and i didn't have to carry anything, so niceeeee =P when i joked with Shirley that i might not want to bring my bag anymore, she thought i was serious. haha.

nawwww i was not, but I'm glad that today was a great day =)

who says that you call this an unlucky day when things like these happen?

*keer: why r you always smiling?

"hehe. cannot smile meh? =P"

"today's a good day!"

*joey: why r you so optimistic?"

"=)"

ARMY

2011-02-21T01:36:00.000-08:00

hello people! I'm back!!! sorry for leaving my blog unattended for a while, i was super duper busy with all kinds of activities and i just came back from a campus camp organised by Acts church! =)

the theme of Acts campus camp was ARMY.
As stated in the theme, the camp was to raise a new generation of God's army. Sermons given by Pastor Kenneth, Pastor Sandra and Pastor David were really inspiring and encouraging, many lives were touched and many rededications were made. Although they were really straight forward with their messages, implying to us that being a soldier was definitely not an easy task, i was awaken by the thought that it's time to stand up. Like a soldier, we must be courageous, strong, obedient, passionate and disciplined to win the war.

Yes, it's not easy to be a Christian who is a true Christian. Are we willing to stand up for people, bless people in any way we can, give out our all to God, give up and let go of things of the world and tell people about Jesus? While doing all these out of good will, some might still think that Christians are hypocrits and "converters". This is when the challenges and obstacles step in to stop us from going forward. I've learnt that we must not be afraid of what other people think as long as we're doing the right thing. Christians are not converters, we're soldiers who are passionate about God and are willing to tell people about Jesus. Because we've experienced such joy in the presence of God, we don't want to keep this blessing to ourselves, this is the reason we tell people. If not, why even bother talking about it? Whether they choose to believe or not, it's their choice =) we just have to play a part to be somebody different and to bless lives around us.

We must understand that we might call ourselves Christians, but our actions reflects who we are. do we act like one? or Christianity is just something we write on the paper which we refer as a religion? i believe that God do not need more people who call themselves Christians only, who do not have a personal realtionship with Him. However, He is looking for soldiers who would walk out of their comfort zone to change the world, to make the world a better place.

would you put on your armour now? =) it's time to march down the battlefield.

make a difference now. if not now, when?

I'm home

2011-02-07T09:56:00.000-08:00

you never know how to appreciate what is before you until you stop and look around, just to find that you have way too much to complain about anything =)

before i left..

i never knew that the stars in Perlis can be so beautiful at night
.....until i learnt to stand under the sky for a few moments, just looking heavenwards

i never realized that my dogs were lonely
......until i stroked their heads a few more times than i usually do, watching them wag their tails

i never bothered cherishing time i had at home
......until i had only 2 days left and so many plans in mind, trying to use all of my time well.

i never thought that housework was hard
.......until i had to do everything by myself, starting to appreciate everything my mum has done for me

i never tasted better food prepared by my family
.......until i could finally taste home-cooked food again, which were obviously FREE and healthier

i never loved Perlis this much before
......until i came back and realized that i missed this place a lot, despite its "nothingness" =P

i never knew that my home can be this beautiful although there are flaws here and there.

i just love being home =)

if you know me well...

2011-02-04T09:45:00.000-08:00

you will know that...

1. i rarely add people on facebook, msn or skype, simply just because i'm lazy to do so.
2. i only reply messages when i feel like doing that, so you will either receive no reply or receive like a day later if not a few hours later. if it's urgent, i'll reply immediately! =) and sometimes i don't reply because my hand phone is out of credit or i didn't check my hand phone, not because your message is not important!
3. i eat a lot and sometimes more than what my tummy can hold! =P
4. i love the stars, the sun, the sea and the sand =D they all start with S! just noticed that.
5. i often make decisions which i do not follow in the end.
6. i always say that i would never ever talk to a certain person but still end up talking to that person. haha! (because i said that when i'm annoyed, never really meant it)
7. i once wanted to be a maid. LOL
8. i love pretty dresses but i rarely wear them. hmmm
9. i collect shiny accessories and cute little things. they're kept in my "treasure" box
10. i don't like it when things start to change.
11. i don't really talk when i'm tired
12. i'm not "girly" enough to be named Christie =P
13. simple things are enough to make me happy =)
14. i love the combination of white and gold.
15. i'm almost always late =/
16. i don't like being cold, so i kinda hate the air conditioner
17. the only sports i'm involved in is jogging, no balls please! =P
18. i MUST cover the blanket over myself when i sleep.
19. i eat like a...um....wolf because i gobble everything. not so nice right? =/
20. if you know at least half of these, i'll be glad! =D

15 things about my first week in college

2011-01-21T02:29:00.000-08:00

1. a lecturer i didn't know held her umbrella over me when it's raining and walked with me till i reach my hostel. That's when i realized that there are very sweet lecturers here. =)

2. i met friends of friends and realized that everyone is linked to everyone. =O

3. i came to realized that there are very nice people here who cares for you even though they don't really know you yet.

4. my classes end later than in secondary school but it is worth it =) though i feel so tired at the end of the day.

5. although i keep telling people that im "pyramid sick" but i love the fact that the canopy walk makes it so easy to get to sunway pyramid =D

6. weekends are awesome but boring when you have nothing to do.

7. i have so many decisions to make already and they're giving me headaches. =/ at the end of the day, it more about following my heart and asking myself how i would like it to be. time to grow up?

8. my mum called me almost everyday? it's better now.

9. i screwed up the 1st time i washed my clothes =P well, at least my clothes are still in shape despite the furry white stuff covering my clothes which i have no idea where they came from.

10. this computer lab must be greatest place in college except during public holidays and weekends =( they're closed on those days!

11. i love my housemates, classmates and collegemates =) they're all awesome people.

12. i sometimes miss home and the people back in perlis =) no one can replace them.

13. i proudly told everyone that i'm a perlisian. most people know that i'm a perlisian but don't know my name XD

14. walking to classes which are far apart from each other and climbing up and down the stairs in my hostel everyday certainly made my legs stronger =P maybe i even have bigger muscles already =D

15. the most frequent question i was asked since the 1st day is, "is your name just CHRIS?"

yeah. JUST Chris =)

the final moment

2011-01-06T21:20:00.000-08:00

sorry for this very late post! i just managed to dig out some time right now to sit and write.

i know i just left perlis and came to KL. it's only 6 hours away, not very far. i'm just going for a year and a half, not very long. But i kept moaning about how much i'm gonna miss it back in perlis.

that's probably why some people wonder about the reason for the big fuss.

and some people, who moans more than me about me leaving =)

thursday night was a night to remember.

out of expectation, the youths in church prepared a surprise for me. and this surprise is no normal stuff we do like throwing eggs and flour, but it was fun and tiring =D

while i was taking photos of some random people, serene appeared before me out of the blue =P

explaining that they prepared a treasure hunt for me, i was give a clue which lead to other clues..and eventually i'll find the "treasure", which is a present they had prepared for me.

so my 1st clue was a picture of a fish pond, which meant that i had to go to the fish pond to find the task. the 1st task was to spin 10 rounds around the umbrella with my head on it, IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. all the other church members were there =/ at 1st i was reluctant, but yeah, it was a game, so i must play it =P as what i've expected, i spun and spun and spun and fell down, which was super funny =D anyway, i got my 2nd clue!

the 2nd clue led me to the grand piano. i was supposed to play and sing a song. =(

what to do? i don't mind playing, but i can't sing because i honestly do not remember any lyrics. (hellO? a bad lyrics memorizer here =O) but thanks to alvin who sang while i played =D

but then i still needed to sing, so serene played the piano and i sang. hehe. i sang the song "adore" by hillsong mainly because that's the only song where there were lyrics provided. =P

3rd clue was the computer! so i went to the computer and saw some weird gorila photo =.= okay, so what should i do with the photo. then serene came dashing in and at the sight of the weird gorila, she asked, "what's that???" okay, so it's not the clue. i found a paper behind the computer and i have to play pictionary! =D so serene whispered into my ear alvin's name, then i started drawing some random person with spiky hair. sze lan was my partner so she started guessing, "boy? man? singer?" =P

of course, she managed to guess that it's alvin after that. or not i might have to draw the whole bollywood dance thingy. haha!

sorry for the very ugly drawing! =P

next, the 4th clue led me to the kitchen, and yeah,. you guessed it right, it had something to do with weird drinks that i was forced to drink. don't remind me of that, but it had chily sauce in it! =( anyone who knows me well know well enough that i hate chilly sauce or tomato sauce, so i decided to choose another option, which was to finish like 1 litre of water at one go. i gave up after i drank half of it because if i kept drinking, i might just explode on the spot! NOT KIDDING! then i drank like a mouthful of the weird drink =O felt like vomiting after that. =P

yay! 5th clue. very close to the treasure right now! okay, so i was told to camwhore with pebbles and shiro while they're in the cage. tell me about it, it was like super hard??? especially when you're using a super heavy dslr which weighs about... ummmm... 3kg??? but i managed to take a photo with pebbles! =D yay!! so they let me pass. =P

now.. it's the last clue! FINALLY!!!!! i looked at the paper and it showed a drawing of a bed.

instinctively, i ran to my bedroom. the 1st thing i saw when i opened the door was the scrap book on the bed. =)

my first kindergarden book

it was indeed a treasure. every page i flipped overwhelmed me with gratitude and happiness =)

everything little thing they wrote in the book meant so much to me.

i love the bible verses they wrote down on every page, those would definitely lift my spirit up when im in my lowest moments.

that's why tears started flowing from my eyes though i seriously didnt want to cry.

these are my awesome friends from church. =)

i love them all.

and now, i miss them a lot too

thank you so much guys =)

you guys have made that night so memorable.

guess what? my photo album is with me in my room =D

no matter how many times i look at it, i will never get tired of it.

c for chris =)

i'll take good care of myself. so guys, don't worry about me. =)

God bless you all

love, chris

here's a post of the farewell night written by sze lan =)

just in case i missed out any details

Chris's farewell party

My second home

2011-01-03T07:11:00.000-08:00

Church has always been my second home. Growing up in church has certainly made me who i am right now. my childhood friends and i grew up together in church. Going to sunday school together, sharing our faith and experiences with God, worshipping God together and serving him have formed a special bond between us. That's why i call them my sisters and brothers in Christ. =)

I'm more than thankful that God placed me in this small church called Perlis Grace Centre. This is where my second family is. leaving perlis soon means leaving church as well. i'm sure i'll miss church a lot.

i'll miss worshipping in this church

i'll miss playing the piano for worship sessions.

i'll miss the cell group we sometimes we have after service

i'll miss the uncles and aunties in church who have always taken me as the little girl

i'll miss practices for drama and planning's for youth celebrations together

i'll miss lunch after church. yum!

i'll miss fellowshipping and also talking crap with the youths in church =P

(and all those funny arguments always never fail to make us laugh so much!)

i'll miss everything and everyone in church =/

but i know, no matter where we are, we can still serve and worship God because God is everywhere =)

and as long as i have a heart after Him, everything else doesn't matter.

my journey in 2010 (part one)

2010-12-31T10:33:00.000-08:00

as 2010 year has approached its end, i guess it would be decent to scan through the whole year and make a short summary of what i did in the year of 2010.

it's impossible for me to recall all my activities, but here's a few that i remember.

chinese new year! it was like normal and kinda boring i have to admit as everyone was not around. but yeah, i had fun with my buddies =D

we practically took pictures only when they came to my house. since someone bought his new camera and was so excited to use it =P

oh yeah, and we recorded some very funny tracks like twinkle twinkle little star and nobody. XD

then we had the mahavajiravudh students from Thailand with us for the collaboration program..

met many "siam lang", got to know a few very nice people.

they gave me gifts before they left, so sweet =)

oops, no pictures of my Thailand friends? sorry!

hmm... what else? ohh..trip to langkawi!
we went with the counseling club although we had nothing to do with it, but since it was opened to everyone, we kinda tagged along. =)

i couldn't forget the disgusting creepy RED toilet!!!! imagine bathing in there with a dim light bulb hanging from above.. =O
fortunately, we just stayed for a night.

our super cool sandcastle! it had a staircase and pillars with spheres on top! like ice cream =D

had a super great time with them! =D

(this is making me miss Susi..sigh)

after that, there was my birthday celebration which was a total surprise =)

as my birthday fell on one of the days of our school exam, so yeah, it wasn't very nice?

but i had my late birthday celebration after the whole exam is over.

weeeee...i love those guys =D

i'm 17!!! =D

then we had sports day! but everyone was like busy studying or sleeping at home. so only a few of my buddies came to give support. but it was still fun =) susi joined us for sports day and she herself got a few medals! how cool =P

and weeee!!! i got a few medals =)

i also went to bali with my parents!

it was a rather nice trip, but it would be great if i got to see dolphins =P

but yeah, there was not much time, so i lived with watching monkeys instead.

(eh, bali monkeys eh! different from malaysia ones)

Hanging out with girlfriends ONLY

we went to the beach to snap random photos =P

i don't think we did anything, but that's the point of hanging out! hehe

I had so much fun!!! =D Hopefully we can do something like this again.

.....to be continued

i couldn't say thank you enough..

2010-12-20T08:42:00.001-08:00

as everyone knows, I've been super duper busy with the preparation of the youth Christmas celebration since a week ago. i have to admit that it wasn't easy when everyone was going away for holidays, causing us to only have a few people left behind to help out. Despite all that, i really thank God for the people He had provided along the preparation that everything could go well. At the same time, I'm really thankful that we have a sporting youth team to make this night successful =)

Serene

Thanks for being so sporting when i come out with weird ideas for your scenes and even agreeing to dance the Bollywood song with me! =P i also wanna thank you for driving me to practice everyday, although i would love to drive you around too ( but you never wanted me to drive because you're so freaked out by my AWESOME skills XD) Anyway, you were a great mary on stage and you look so sweet with Joseph! working with you is awesome, hopefully we'll still have a few years of performance together till you or i fly away to somewhere far.

Naresh

Lembu! thank you so much for your patience and kindness =) thank you for driving everyone home even though our homes are like so far apart. you're an awesome driver! but this doesn't make you an awesome man, so jangan syok sendiri XD (just kidding lol) anyway, thanks for being so supportive towards this celebration and accepting all the tasks i gave to you without any complains =P again, you acted well on stage just now! maybe you were born to be Joseph! oops, we already have one Joseph in church. hehe.

awesome explanation during the games too =)

Bee Ying

Being the worship leader was a tough job! but you did really well =) thank u so much for being the narrator for the drama. i know it wasn't easy when we keep changing dialogs every time we act on stage XD so yea, you did a really good job =D i think you're the best narrator ever! By the way, i didn't know that you could translate so well =P and yes! you danced well, so don't worry about it.

Alvin

i have to say, you're more hyperactive than me! =P thank you for all the friends you brought and creating such an awesome atmosphere tonight =) we're really glad to have those people from matrix. And yes, without you, i think everyone won't be as high because you're laughing for no reason most of the time XD thank you for spending time to practice with us after class for so many days, you played the role of nathan well =)

Daniel

Thank you for the friends you've brought! and thank you for saying yes to everything i ask you to do. =) you did your part really well, i'm proud to have people like you in the team. do you know that you look really cool in the crown and the robe? =P do keep that nice smile on your face all the time! you really rocked in the heaven's scene.

Alvin and Daniel

might not see you guys anymore when i come back from KL, will miss you guys! this is the 1st time we worked together and probably the last =) May God bless you two abundantly.

Melchor

and your existence in this celebration was so random! we met you in aunty Christina's house and wala, you became an angel after 10 minutes of conversation =P thanks for taking my place as the angel (though i wanted to be the angel badly XD) so that i can take the role of Kelly. without you, we might need to duplicate ourselves to play different roles! and you're like the funniest angel around =P thanks for bringing laughter every time we have practice and TRAVELLING from the far far chuping to kangar =P

Addison

You were super duper cool on stage during the band competition! congrats for getting into the finals! your team was definitely one of the best! =) thanks for joining us for practice and contributing ideas although you had to practice with your band every night. i bet you were even more tired than all of us, so thank you so much for your sporting spirit =) the sounds and lights effects were perfect! thank you for your willingness to stay back a lil longer to help out.

Suyen

girl although you weren't here with us tonight, i thank you for your prayers! =) thank you for joining us for practice after you knew that you weren't able to make it tonight. your support means a lot to me =D so yeah, you totally deserve credit too! and thank you for practicing with us even though you were having an exam after a few days.

Heidi

Little girl! thanks for monitoring the projector and helping me with the registration =) you did an awesome job! i'm glad that you finally came on this day. =P anyway, thanks for being so helpful and friendly towards our new friends =) next year when i'm not around anymore, ask Naresh to wash the plates with you! =P

Ying Sern

thank you for being a super efficient runner to help us buy stuff and to clear up the stuff after the celebration. =) too bad we couldn't include you in the drama, i could have given you an AWESOME role. =P yeah, you're strong! thats why i left you carrying the keyboard for a few minutes XD (just kidding)

Erwin
buying gifts with you, Naresh and Serene was an...ummmm... interesting experience. i finally knew what happens when 4 cheapskate people go out together to buy stuff. XD we spend most of the time calculating the prices in our heads and end up wanting to buy files and pens as gifts because we like em so much. uh oh, we ARE nerds.

Erwin and Ermin
thank you for always staying to watch us practice although you guys couldn't make it for the celebration. you two have shown us how much you supported us =) and don't worry, we'll have more celebrations and performances after this so that you two can join us, except me of course =P anyway, i just wanna let you know that we really appreciate everything you guys have done =)

Henna, Karmen, Joseph, Benjamin

thank you for your prayers and support! =) hopefully we can work together next time when you guys are back in Perlis.

Lastly, a big thank you to all the aunties and uncles who ordered and served the food, and to those who helped to clear up =)

the youth team did not utter a word of complain at all and were very supportive of this celebration. they gave out all their time and energy for this night. i'm glad to have them and i couldn't say thank you enough. =)

thank God for his grace for the whole journey, and the night when everyone knew that Jesus's birth was not just a fairytale =)

what makes chris, CHRIS? (part 2)

2010-12-19T09:43:00.000-08:00

remember part one of what makes Chris, CHRIS?

here's part two! Again, it's full of random stuff about me. so if you're not interested, you better just stop reading right HERE. XD

1. i love to eat cheese.
2. i always lose my stuff because I'm so forgetful and careless. =(
3. i think I'm kinda a home person, i don't mind staying at home the whole day
4. I'm so not mushy with people close to me
5. i love flowers! especially lilies and tulips!
6. i don't know how to make up and i don't like eye liners because they look like colour pencils =P
7. I'm not really a big fan of nail polish
8. i prefer dogs over cats
9. i believe in true LOVE =D
10. when I'm sleepy, my mind goes blank
11. I'm nocturnal! not really a morning person.
~~12. i can't wait to get married and have kids! (okay this is a joke)~~
12. i'm thinking hard about my future career
13. my heart melts easily when people say sweet stuff or do anything nice for me =)
14. my favourite statement for now is "eh...super nice ehh!"
15. i love kids!
16. i worry too much about things that aren't worth worrying about
17. i'm a bad decision maker, surprise?
18. i have a big NONO towards perverts =O
19. i can bake but not cook, except cooking maggie mee of course
20. i think i act like a grandma/aunty/mother sometimes, not a very good sign. TOO LONG WINDED

i think thats all for now! i hope i didn't bore you out with these SUPER random facts =P

still 17...or....already 17?

2010-12-14T08:14:00.000-08:00

Being 17 just comes once in a lifetime.

somehow, it's short, busy, painful, fun, enjoyable, interesting, and sad all at the same time. complicated no?

Being 17 is...

Being the seniors in high school, the leaders of groups and societies.

Being the ones who people seek advice from, the ones who seem to be the most experienced in high school.

Being the ones who are expected to do nothing but study so that we can get good results.

it's not too bad being 17 =)

our teachers give us privilege because we're taking SPM.

the only lousy part is that we have to take spm and suffer under a big pile of books when the others are enjoying their holidays.

we talked about leaving school ever since school started, and now.. we're finally leaving school for real.

we talked about dreams and plans after our exam, imagining how life would be like after we go to a whole new place.

we talked about friendship and boy-girl relationships, wondering whether we would still be the same after we meet all kinds of people out there.

it's like just a moment ago when we were worried about our exam, and now, everything is over.

no more chatting in class, no more going for tuition, no more studying till its late at night.

now that it's gone, we prepare ourselves to enter a whole new stage of life where we leave school and enter college.

I've always thought that being 17 actually makes me old enough to handle my own stuff, make my own decisions and to take care of myself. but i guess i was wrong

i thought that it was better off if i did everything on my own, but after this i think i will miss my mum doing things for me =/

i think, i will miss home.

miss my family, miss my friends, miss my church members.

everything here in perlis which makes it home.

however, I'm also excited to enter a new stage of life, going to college, making new friends, living in a new place. =) i know that I'm gonna enjoy myself in college. 5 years of high school life was just nice, now that it's enough, it's time to move on.

so...

if you ask me whether I'm still 17 or already 17..

my answer is.. I'm STILL 17.

there' a difference to it.

for now, I'm just gonna enjoy the rest of my 17-year-old days =)

which reminds me, i won't be wearing the uniform anymore =P

beautiful and pretty

2010-12-12T10:53:00.000-08:00

ever heard of the saying "beauty is in the eyes of the beholder?"

true enough, everyone has their own point of view, everyone has their own cup of tea. you can't really expect everyone to think that a girl is pretty or expect someone to think that you're beautiful if you're just not that person's favourite kind.

In spite of that, who doesn't want to be the prettiest girl? the girl who people think is exceptionally beautiful? i guess sometimes it's a girl's nature to be vain in a way as they care about how they look and how people think about them. From comparing clothes to their hair. i guess there's just too much a girl cares about huh?

i have always believed that being pretty and beautiful is different.

pretty has always been such a surface thing, yes i have to admit, not everyone can be pretty.

but beauty is so much more, it's more than just skin deep, more than just what you see with your naked eyes.

being beautiful is not easy, but every girl can be beautiful no matter how they look =)

i remember someone telling me before, there is bound to be a person who thinks you're beautiful

no matter how the others think. the others might think that you're not beautiful enough, not attractive enough, they might look at your flaws, your weaknesses. Nevertheless, there'll be one who loves you just the way you are and actually thinks you're beautiful genuinely. in fact, more beautiful than any other women that you think are 1000000 times more beautiful than you are.

so, beauty is actually a very subjective matter.

we can't really define beauty, we can't really set a standard of how beautiful people should look like. everyone has their own special trait, you can't have everything, but you have your own special look which other people do not have and will never have.

be grateful that you were borned with a perfect face without flaws.

you're beautiful just the way you are.

there's no need to be pretty like the celebrities you see on the television. yes, their looks are intriguing.

so what?

doesn't being beautiful inside mean so much more?

a person who has a beautiful heart looks beautiful to me no matter how she looks on the outside =)

maybe not everyone thinks this way, but i still think that being beautiful is something which you see thoroughly in a person..not just the cover.

so what are the differences between pretty and beautiful? Here are a list of the differences i could think of for now =P

PRETTY

1. it does not last long, after the passing of time, it wears off or the eyes just get tired of it.

2. it can actually be obtained through plastic surgery and make up

3. it makes a girl attractive and nice to look at

4. you think a girl is pretty by just looking at her in one glance

5. pretty needs money most of the time! i think

6. it can be quite manipulative sometimes

BEAUTIFUL

1. it lasts forever!!!!!! a woman just gets more and more beautiful with the passing of time

2. it is showned through a kind heart

3. it makes a girl lovable and nice to be with

4. you think a girl is beautiful after getting to know her well

5. it doesn't need pretty clothes, shiny accessories or make up =)

6. it never changes, never presses, it stays just the way it should be

it's your choice to choose between being pretty and being beautiful.

the heart inside of you matters the most.

just be yourself, you can never be replaced by anyone else.

Its over =)

2010-12-09T11:13:00.000-08:00

spm is over!!!! =D
i could finally shout at the top of my lungs that it is officially over!!!
(which i've already done)

i could finally jump around while telling everyone that my exam is over!
(which i've already done too!)

i could finally sit in front of the computer for the whole day doing nothing!!
(which is what i'm planning to do)

anyway, there're more plans to come and i will blog about them in another post.
right now, i'll just talk about what i've done so far after the last paper which was just about a few hours ago.

okay let's start from the moment the clock strikes 4.30pm.
"please take my paper, take my paper" i thought as i looked at the adjudicators desperately. chang zhi who sat in front of me squeaked out of excitement. "sabar sabar" the head adjudicator said to chang zhi. i giggled. the moment we handed out our papers to the teachers, it was like we were freed from the cage! okay that's exaggerating, but we've been locked up by the boundaries of the do's and don'ts of spm for such a long long long long time (at least that's what i think). so now when we're free! we can do whatever we want to do =)

after having a quick bath (okay not so quick) =P, i went to church for caroling practice! with a super duper excited and happy spirit, i think i became crazy during the caroling practice XD Besides, ying sern is back and he has become so much thinner!!!!

okay ignore that random fact.

so after practicing until our voices were sore, we went to aunty christina and uncle gary's house. the moment i stepped into their house, the first thing that captured my attention was the shiny christmas tree made of glittering ribbons! it looked so pretty and cool! who ever thought of making a christmas tree using a bamboo stick and 5 strings of ribbons? sorry guys, no pictures because my camera's being faulty again. just so you know, the bamboo stick was planted into a pot and the ribbons were plastered to the wall with transparent tape. trust me, it looks almost as good as a normal christmas tree! on the wall were beautiful and nicely patterned snowflakes! uncle gary did it all by himself, it was really nice =) i'll definitely make sure my camera works the next time i go to their house. XD

after the guests arrived, naresh explained that christmas songs were sung because we really enjoy singing them to please God's heart. then, we had our carolers singing as i joined them striking the tambourine. XD i wanted to record it, but again, my camera was faulty just now. *SIGH*

After caroling, aunty christina prepared an ice-breaking game for everyone to take part, old or young. we had some older people with some youths, altogether about 25 people. Alvin and daniel brought their friends from matrix =D so there were so many youths! by the way, heidi and i won the ice breaking game and we got extra presents =P

of course, how can we miss out the great food! though the greatest part is not the food, it's actually the fellowship we had with our new friends! i got to know so many nice people but i only remember a few of their names since im bad with names. ummm, i think there's sobha, suhanya, and ummm.....well i can't really recall.
i just remember laughing the whole night until my cheek muscles are sore. i really had a great time just now =) the best part is, the students from matrix told us that they never had so much fun since a long time. ahh, it was an awesome gathering.

lastly, uncle gary shared with us how happy he and aunty christina were to hear our laughters the whole night and to have us with them to celebrate christmas. =D

tonight, every single person really had fun =)

*yawns*

signing off for now,
chris

two weeks more of high school life..

2010-11-25T02:29:00.001-08:00

So here's an interesting and random conversation I had with my friends one morning which made me realize how much I'm gonna miss it here.

P.s: it's not 100% the same, but definitely a simplified and combined version of the long conversations we had before.

Me: eh, my friend told me that there's another girl who has the name chris living in kl. Her sister is also named hannah! But different spelling la.

Friends: *awed expressions* walau, such a coincidence!

Me: yalorrrr!!!

WWH: your dad copy from where ar? *laughs*

Me: LOL. *makes faces*

YK: funny la you, always make weird faces. Actions also so exaggerating. Hahahahaha

Me: ceh, say somemore, one day you all sure miss me one.

JY: Yalor, if there's no you, it would be really quiet.

ZC: quiet then good la! I would be very happy. Hiak hiak hiak

me: ish, then don't come and tell me that you miss me lor. There's no me then you all won't laugh until like this dy.

JY: yalor, I will really miss her. Such a special person. Will miss her voice and laughter.

Me: awwwww... So touching..Why r you so sentimental today ar? Hehe.

JY: no ma, really marh..hehe.. Next time we won't get to see you anymore.

Me: no laa, I will still come back to perlis.. It's just that we will rarely meet each other.

WH: if next time I meet another chris, I wouldn't want to know her.

Me: why leh?

WH: because I already know such a great chris! Other chris'es won't be as good.

Me: AWWWWWWWW SO SWEEEEEET AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEEHHE
*giggles like a crazy kid*
SOOOO HAPPY!!!!
Why suddenly become so sweet ar?

Wh: hehehe. I'm just telling you the truth wad.

ZC: aiyo no la, why do you want to hide the truth? Actually right, what he wants to say is.... I Dont want to know another chris anymore because I ALREADY KNOW THE KIND OF PERSON CHRIS IS!! Other chris'es would be the same!

Me: *speechless* good one! AAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

*everyone laughs*

I will really miss these fellas! =)

wh: why do you want spm to end so fast? After spm we won't get to spend as much time together anymore

Me: ur head! We all can go out to

yamcha everyday!

Wh: i dun wana yam cha, I wana yam 'kopi'

Me: lame la u, go and drink drain water la =P

I suddenly remember that I won't get to see them so often anymore after spm because I'm heading to college right after new year. =(

*sigh*

Gotta move on though.

When I come back to perlis, I'll definitely meet up with my buddies again =)

a super duper random post

2010-11-13T08:16:00.000-08:00

i just realized how much i miss updating my blog. =)

so..here are some random stuffs.

1. spm is a week away.
2. i think, it should be okay.
3. about number 2, i was talking about spm
4. geesh i should stop talking about spm.
5. okay, so...

wait, spm is JUST a week away????

6. okay I'm freaking out
7. no la don't worry, it's nothing
8. SPM ONLY MARH. NO A+ THEN NO A+ LORRRRRR =P
9. yea right, maybe i should get back to my books
10. i would be praying for all my friends who are taking spm =) all the best to all of you!
11. i've been eating and sleeping a lot lately
12. i've been thinking of plans after spm every single day
13. hold on, why am i still talking about spm?
14. right...ummm.....well...i don't think i have anything else to talk about for now
15. i just came online for like a LITTLE while to update my blog

please don't scold me =(

or miss me.. =P hahahahahhahahah

16. okay i guess that's all. CIAOS! =D

p/s: sorry if you read this post and you think it's total crap =P
i'll come up with decent posts when im free, which is after spm =)

The Flood in Kangar, Perlis

2010-11-03T21:07:00.000-07:00

On the 2nd of November, a flood hit perlis.

Fields turned into "water fields", roads turned into rivers, puddles turned into lakes. Water was everywhere! well....Almost =P

Lower areas have been covered by the flood waters as the water tank and rivers were overflowing due to the heavy downpour since Sunday. Some parts in perlis which are built at higher grounds were safe from the rushing waters. Because of the flood, electricity and water were cut off in some areas. Fortunately, the flood did not last for long that by the time the water has receded after 3 days, many could finally take their baths again, WITH LIGHTS ON.

These are the pictures from the first day taken by my dad in the morning.

By then, the rain has stopped but the water was still rising.

On the second day, everyone arised from sleep and realized that the water had risen too. lol!

worse still, it started to rain again!

Here are the photos. If you observe and compare the same places. you can see how much the water had risen from day one to day two.

In the evening, Benjamin and Joseph came over because their apartment were out of electricity. By then, the clouds have cleared and the sun gave out rays of bright yellow light.

no more grey clouds in the sky blocking the sun!

there's warmth and light again

a sign from heaven indeed =D

so we went out for a walk to have a look of the waters. =P

benjamin and joseph

water field

we wanted to walk to my school but it was so hard to walk in the water that we were moving at a very slow pace. Before we could reach my school, it was already dark so we headed home.

And erm yea... we just had to get wet before going back =P

it's not always that there's water everywhere anyway. hehe

Thanks to my awesome idea of running in the water, i fell down and got my whole body wet, from head to toes. eeeeee....anyway. it was really fun! =D

so finally the flood is over, everything's okay again. =)

p/s: just in case you're wondering if my house was affected, no it's not and i'm fine.

thanks to the people who were concerned =)

Rain rain go away, come again another day

2010-11-01T07:58:00.001-07:00

It has been raining non-stop since yesterday. Dark clouds have been hovering in the sky all day, making the sky gloomy even when it's morning.

When the weather fell apart, rain came down in sheets, never ceasing as if the clouds were vomiting all their contents after holding it for years. (okay this is a weird personification but it's like that! =P) sometimes the rain poured down in big droplets, pounding the roofs hard and loud, which is very deafening. Sometimes the thunder rumbled in the distance, which is very deafening too.

Everywhere I go, I have to step into puddles of water, everything feels mushy and damp. Honestly, I never really liked cold weathers. my room is cold, my hands are cold, the water in the bathroom is cold, everything feels cold. I just want the sun to come out and bring warmth again.

apparently, the rain is not going to stop soon. In fact, a few areas in perlis have been flooded. It's kinda scary to imagine perlis having a flood AGAIN since the last time in 2000. My friend even said that we might need to take our spm exam during the flood.

-.- let's hope that doesn't happen.

I hope the weather would eventually return to normal.

Despite all those, it's feels really nice to sleep at night because the weather's so cooling and I don't have to switch on the fan. =D

stars

2010-10-28T09:58:00.000-07:00

*puff*

i cupped my hand beside my mouth and blew the stars on the wall one by one. She looked at me, wondering what i was doing. I smiled and whispered to her, "this would make the stars glow at night." Her eyes widened even more, obviously amazed by the "magic" show i just performed. "if you blow the stars every night, they will glow brightly even when there's no light." My friends beside giggled as her elder sister grinned at me. After the lights were switched off, the stars glowed with a luminous soft light, just like the stars in the sky. "wow!" we exclaimed. She beamed and giggled happily. "you know magic!" she said to me.

Ever since that day, she always told her sister, "that jie jie who blow stars can make the stars glow!"

So, my friend sighed as she said to me, "now my sister blows the stars every night, i told her that you lied, but she doesn't believe me."

haha! aren't kids the cutest things alive? =)

if and only if we were as innocent as they are.. =P

you said you were going home..

2010-10-22T20:19:00.000-07:00

this is a self-composed song dedicated to someone.

You said you were going home

to a place of paradise

you want to leave with no regrets

without any trace behind

i'm still not ready to let you leave

to lose you from my life

to see an absence everyday

knowing that you're not here anymore

you think that you're a burden

if you stayed any longer

you think it's a better place

if we had to see you go

i'm still not ready to let you leave

to lose you from my life

to see an absence everyday

knowing that you're not here anymore

but i know that you're going home

to reconcile with our Father

to a better place with a better life

so i will have to learn to be stronger

when you're not here anymore..

My father's heart

2010-10-22T11:00:00.001-07:00

My father seldom speaks romantically nor is he good at expressing his feelings through words but there's one thing about him-- his actions always speak louder than words.

My father do not need poetic expressions of words or fancy sentences to tell us how much he loves us, he just quietly do things for us, always ready to sacrifice anything for his family.

My father might act like a child sometimes to bring a smile to our faces but I know in my heart that he is more mature than anyone else I know.

Most of the time I do not realize, but in my father, I get a glimpse of my own reflection. Our weaknesses and strengths, flaws and gifts, it's who we are inside.

My father says it's okay and doesn't want us to worry but he doesn't realize that he being stubborn just makes us worry even more. Making him change his decision just by an inch is as difficult as moving a mountain.

My father acts tough all the time but he has the softest heart. Just a call from any of my siblings brings a smile to his face for the whole day.

My father cannot wait to tell my whole family when I make him happy or proud. he sees more in me than I see myself. Sometimes I act like I cannot hear but I have heard him talking to my brother about me. =P

Despite my father's interest to tell other people good stories about me, he likes to tell them embarrassing moments of mine even more. For example, i think he told the whole world how i wore my swimming suit in a reversed order and yes, many more humiliating stories. And every time, the stories result in roaring laughter, oh if i can find a deep hole and hop into it. =P Nevertheless, this is how my dad brought so much fun into our family.

My father has the biggest heart ever. He never hesitates to give no matter in terms of money or service. He himself wears a shirt for 10 years whereas he spends for other people.

My father tells me that he will forgive me no matter what I do, be there for me no matter what happens. This is so because a family stays together no matter what. He has emphasized that family is the MOST important for like a million times before.

My father has a faithful heart after God. He never ceases to serve God whole-heartedly and to seek Him in making every decision. My father is who he is today because God full of grace has poured abundant blessings over him and his family.

My father shed tears of joy when he knew that his two sons were getting married. There's nothing else that can bring more joy to my father's heart. All he wants to see is every child of his having a bright future ahead. Just knowing this makes him contented more than ever.

My father never said that he has successful children because he's a good father. The only thing he ever said was God has been good to him, that's why his family received so much blessings. For by our strength we are nothing, but with God we have everything.

My father's heart's desire is to give, love, and believe
.....unconditionally.

He has learnt from the best of the best, our father God in heaven.

That's why I have the greatest daddy on earth! =)

p/s: this post should be enough to make my dad smile for 50 years =P

note to sis: look at his pictures! all wearing the same nautica shirt! we should really get him a shirt the next time. hahahahahhaah

Nearing spm.. Study study study

2010-10-18T06:49:00.001-07:00

It's like spm is so near, everyone is studying after ditching msn and facebook behind. Going to school everyday is what we all despise right now as we always end up talking and talking the whole morning when our teachers give us trial papers to do. It's like we haven't met each other for ages! XD so, we rather stay at home and force ourselves to study. However, it's weird how i get more tired when I stay at home, maybe because I don't talk as much at home. Hmmmm.. I usually sleep till it's like really late then i'll wake up and study for an hour or more then sleep again. Worse thing is, i'll take a nap again in the evening. I even wondered whether I was sick because I felt like sleeping all the time. Anyway, Jiaying and i heard that it's good to study at dawn like at about 4 or 5am, so both of us filled with the spirit to study hard decided to wake up early in morning. Of course, we ended sleeping like pigs... Again. At last, we decided that maybe studying like that just wasn't our kind of thing to do. =P

Oh well, back to studying again. Ciaos!

empty and beautiful by matt maher

2010-10-09T10:51:00.001-07:00

My past won't stop haunting me
In this prison there's a fight between
Who I am and who I used to be

This thorn in my side is a grace
For because of it the flesh and blood of God
Was offered in my place, my place

You fought the fight in me
You chased me down and finished the race
I was blind but now I see
Jesus You kept the faith in me

Where did my best friends go?
In my defense they disappeared
Just like Your friends did to You, oh Lord

But You were there, You gave me strength
So this little one might come to know
The glory of Your name, Your name

Chorus
You fought the fight in me
You chased me down and finished the race
I was blind but now I see
Jesus You kept the faith in me

Bridge
Awaiting, set apart like incense to Your heart
A libation I'm pouring out
Empty and beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
You fought the fight in me

You chased me down and finished the race
I was blind but now I see
Jesus You kept the faith in me
Jesus You kept the faith in me

baking cupcakes!

2010-10-09T10:17:00.000-07:00

during the holidays, joie, joanna, suzie and suyen came over to my house to bake cupcakes! we had lots of fun mixing, beating, baking and decorating! and of course, the cupcakes were delicioussss!!!

sorry, there're no more left =P

here are the photos, enjoy! this time, less words, more pictures =D

from left: suyen (the "awarder"), me (egg eyes), joie (chilly eyes)

Before baking

After baking: cupcakes from heaven!

decorating....

hearts and stars =D

smileys!!! =)

joie's amazing cupcake

upper left: suyen, upper right: suzie, lower left: me!, lower right: joie

the circle of friends and cupcakes

cupcakes are delicious!!! give a BIG LIKE!!

i love cupcakes! i love my buddies!

Four in my memory

2010-10-09T04:41:00.001-07:00

when i was in primary school, i had 3 best friends whom we could consider ourselves the four sisters. We did everything together, went everywhere together, stuck together all the time. When we graduate from primary school, we separated as i went to another school. I remember how they joked about how i will not mix around with them anymore after i enter a different school. They were worried that the four of us will not be as close as before. I told them not to worry, but i was wrong.

We seldom met each other after that, our tuition's were different, we didn't keep in touch as some of us still didn't have hand phones back then. In these 5 years, we became almost like strangers. Sometimes, i wonder if it was my fault, that i didn't make an effort to approach them, or spend more time to talk to them when we bumped into each other. But then, i have people to remind me that it was indeed not easy.

Yesterday, we finally came out together after 5 long years. It would be a lie if i said that nothing has changed between us. Despite that, yesterday was great because i realized that all of us still care for each other as much though time has changed us. Even though we all admitted that it was hard to keep in contact and thought that it was awkward in a way that we rarely talked anymore after separating, we still felt the bond between. Sitting together last night, we still laughed like we always did, babbling about all kinds of stuff, just enjoying each other's presence. And it did not feel awkward. =D

Honestly, i never knew that they still cared about the bond four of us has formed 5 years ago where no matter what happens, four of us will still be like how we used to be, four in one =)

Meet my sisters, shao tian, rou yi and zi ching.

They made wonderful memories with me when i was still young.

Now we are older, but the memories stay just like how they were always meant to be.

a good samaritan

2010-10-07T04:05:00.001-07:00

it was 3.15pm. The uncle's car hasn't arrived. He probably thought that my class would be ending at 5pm. I looked around trying to find anyone who could lend me his/her handphone but all my friends were long gone.
I fumbled through my pencil case and miraculously found 20 sens. Nevertheless, it was useless in the end because even the public phone failed me. *sigh*
So, i came up with a few options. I could either walk to my dad's clinic and wait till he finìshes work at 5.30pm OR i could just walk to the library and make a call to... The uncle? I don't have his number. Rhu yie! I could contact her and she could help me to contact the uncle and..
Well, finally i decided that it was all too troublesome so i just chose the last option---- walk home.

The last time i walked to and fro between my house and school was probably last year. I remember how i used to walk under the hot sun, sweating for 15 minutes, dreading it. Especially when 3.30pm was the time for me to take a nap.
I always felt sleepy during this time of the day. Anyway the weather was kind of good, so despite feeling sticky and hot, i tried to enjoy the walk.

After walking for 10 minutes when i was already halfway, suddenly, i heard horning sounds of a car coming from the other side of the road. Then i looked up and saw them.
She gestured for me to go in front. And he waved to me. I got the message and wanted to signal them that it's okay. However they just continued to gave instructions to me till the light turned green. So, I walked across the road after i saw the car stopped beside the road. He met me in the middle of the road and offered me a lift home. Full of gratitude, all i could say was 'thank you so much paventhan' he didn't reply and then opened the car door for me wheareas his mum like usual, smiled but said nothing.

This reminded me of how some came telling me that they had seen me walking on the road sometimes. However, only a few stopped.

Just like the story told by jesus in the bible. Some people are better off but they claim to be too busy to give a hand or expect someone else to do the job of helping. In the end, the good samaritan is the one who helps u.

Today, i met a good samaritan =)

Thanks pav!

dentist no?

2010-10-06T03:11:00.001-07:00

'i want to be the best dentist in the world!'
I grinned as i told her. She asked me how.

'if u give free dental treatment, that would be the best,' she joked.
'of course i would give free treatment to the poor and needy, i want to help them. But i'll give u free treatment too. Hehe.'
'that's good, but the people out there need more doctors than dentists. Why not be a doctor?' she said.

this actually got me thinking. Sigh. Looks like i need to rethink my ambition.

Perhaps, becoming an excellent dentist is not everything

Angel

2010-10-02T09:16:00.001-07:00

I saw an angel.
Her age was countable with the 5 fingers of my hand.
She looked at me and gave an angelic smile.
While everyone bowed their heads, she swarmed in and out.
Then, she stopped when she saw someone crying.
'why is she crying?' she wondered.
Too young to understand, she tried to help.
So, she pulled the blanket straight and smoothed the ends with her tiny hands.
My fingers continued on the piano as I silently observed her.
The music went on.
The prayers went on.
God dwelt in the place, his presence as strong as ever.

Matthew 18:3
i tell you the truth, unless you turn around and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven

Today, I saw an angel in a child.

Friends (part one)

2010-10-01T07:59:00.001-07:00

when we talk about friends, we label them into all sort of groups like best friends, good friends, normal friends, childhood friends and many more. I personally feel that every friend plays a different role in our lives where no one can replace anyone nor no one is better than anyone. Those who are close to us know us well, and they are the ones who just manage to "click" so easily with us. Indeed, not everyone can understand us, bear with us, stand by us nor trust us no matter what. That's why we have close friends whom we can confide in and friends who are merely friends.

today, im not gonna label anyone into any groups because i just want you to know that you're my close friend and im glad to have you in my life. =) and yes, not everyone deserves to be in this list, so be proud if u see your name =P (the numberings are not rankings okay? so don't be disappointed if you find your name at the bottom, they're in random order.)

Joie
i knew her since i was borned! we have been best friends for 17 years already =) She knows me well and we have gone through so much together since young. We hung out in church, each other's houses, church outings and camps and tuitions. =P i still remember when we were young she always came to my house and we would build houses out of boxes and sew barbie doll clothes out of rags. we call ourselves the creative heart art attack team (i think? i don't really remember the name. but it definitely has heart and attack! inspired by art attack) we had so many good memories together that i cannot simply type everything here. but those were the good old times =D we even composed a Bo Bice song which goes on like this. Bo bice, like to eat rice, there's a mice....ummm..then the song went on with his house getting bombed or something. I even remember how we used to play s club 7's songs over and over again as we dance in my room XD. haha. i really thank joie for scolding me when i was wrong, she told me things i never knew about myself, good or bad. because of her, i have learnt my lessons and changed for the better =) and the best thing is, i know that she always trusts me for she knows what kind of person i am =) even though we did not get to spend as much time together after we went to high school, nothing can break our bond =P

Suyen
i also knew her since young! she's always like a sister to me because she's a year older. i used to cycle to her house to play barbie dolls and borrow her comic books to read. She has mountains of books at home o.O im not kidding. one thing with suyen is that i can share everything with her, she's always willing to listen to me as i pour out my problems. More importantly, she's someone whom i can have fellowship with, to share our faith and to encourage each other in our walk with God. We are not afraid to tell each other everything! the jogging track is the place where we always love to go to together as we often end up walking 3km just talking and talking. XD Besides, we went to the same primary school and secondary school =D so, i had always got a lift back home, thanks to her =P
although she likes to make fun of me and call me big mouth, it doesnt matter because it's suyen =D hahaha. Besides, she's always so caring towards me =) once i was scolded by a teacher because of..ehemm..helping someone...(you guys know it)..and ended up getting blamed and crying like baby. There she was, giving me her embrace and comfort =)

Jia ying aka ABBIE (ABI)
she gets very bubbly and crazy when we get together, and she is the only one who laughs like me!!!! like loud, not-so-coy, bizzare, crazy kind of laughter which practically scares all the guys away. but who cares? =P what i love most about her is she doesnt care about how other people think of her, always being the herself no matter what. of course, she is very nice just how she is =) we're the most '38' and exaggerating people in our form 5 gang. Though we talk crap most of the times, imitate our tuition teachers/friends' gestures and facial expressions, act in boyish ways together, we share many secrets and encourage each other in many ways =) in fact, jia ying is very 'FRIEND',(it means that she's a very dependable and faithful friend) i remember the 1st time i met her in a camp when we were in standard 5, she spoke out for me although she didnt really knew me yet. XD and yes, I think it's cute how she now likes to stare at me and suddenly blurt out that she won't get to see me for long, Awwww.. I love this girl =P

Rhu yie
Ahhh, this is the cheeky one I met in kindergarden, we seperated when we went to different primary schools and met again in secondary school. I always thought that her name was spelt the same as my dog LOUIE, oh well, but it's not. =P she was my best friend in kindergarden!!! We used to come up with naughty ideas. One of them was we convinced a girl who didn't have any transport back home to go up the bus with us, we told her that the bus driver will send her home (as if the bus driver was our amat), hid her behind us, tried to cover her so that the bus driver doesn't find out. However, the bus driver found out, scolded us and the girl's mum came to take her, seemed that she was just a little late. Oops! Anyway back to the main point, rhu yie's a sweet girl who looks sweet, talks sweetly, always being so sweet. That's the word, SWEET. Though she's very sampat too and she hits people really hard!! =P not forgetting her movies, series and shows, She's the largest tv addict i've ever known. Haha. If I were to talk about my future husband, I would surely find her =P. we can talk about all kinds of stuff too and she can keep my secrets, most of the times. She's also the kind of friend who fights for you when u get bullied. hahaha!

Shermaine
Hmm.. Let's see. Shermaine and i were Kindergarden best buddies, primary school classmates, secondary school best buddies again, debate teammates, music schoolmates! Wow! I never knew that we had so much in common =P I've known this girl for so many years and she has grown and changed a lot. During our younger days, Shermaine, rhu Yie and I were the best buddies who stuck together no matter what. When we were 5 or 6, rhu yie went to another class. Or course, shermaine and I were very sad. So, I taught shermaine to lie to the teacher that we wanted to go the toilet but we actually wanted to sneak into rhu yie's class. What happened? We went inside the toilet, I asked shermaine to 'shishi' to produce sound effects. XD. Waited for about 5 minutes then told her it's time. We went out the toilet, stood outside rhu yie's class, got caught by the teachers who found out we lied, got scolded and never did that again. Lol. I think I was always convincing her to do bad stuff. Hehe. A similiarity between the both of us is that we're not the romantic kind of people who say mushy stuff. we might be more direct when we speak to each other. And this is good cause I know that she always speaks her mind, in fact, we can guess each other's thinking! How cool is that? =P on top of that, i also thank her for always encouraging me =) I posted my 1st piano playing video on fb because of her! Ahh and I remember how she used to come over to my house and we'll talk about everything, like seriously everything. Good old times. XD

Chooi phing (apple jie)
She sits beside me in class! We've been sitting next to each other for 3 years already =D honestly, I really enjoy sitting with her though she doesn't allow me to lie on her shoulder, pushes my things away, asks me to throw rubbish for her ect. Ahahahaha! Despite that, she shares everything with me! A very generous person indeed. She's my main supplier of tissue because of my sinus problems. Because of her, I have no worries about tissue paper! Weeeee! By the way, did I mentioned that she's funny? Haha! She has a very good sense of humour, we like to joke and laugh ourselves during classes. I'm the one who talks all the time and she's the one who listens attentively to the teacher, not me. A funny thing is that she used to take out her bear keychain and asked me to talk to it since she's not listening. XD FUNNY! She's the kind of best friend who's not the typical kind of best friend but treats u as a bestfriend wholeheartedly and silently =) complicated eh?

p/s: there will be many parts as i can't write about everyone in one post. so don't worry i'll definitely write about you if you don't find yourself in this post =P

......to be continued

P/s: my guy friends, I'll give you guys a post especially for guys only, so be like a man and wait patiently. XD

yiaks! Im a diamond?

2010-09-26T07:08:00.001-07:00

last friday, my school organized a 2-day-camp in semarak for their so-called Derma Diamonds which consist of 21 students including me. The camp's main objective was to help students with their weaker subjects so that all of them can obtain all A+'s. Tell me about it, just in 2 days i've already heard almost a hundred times of the word 'A star'. Anyway, I went out of obligation, also hoping to actually learn something. Though i ended up so weared out after the camp, there were a few things which made the whole camp a sweet experience. Okay, canceling the fact that mosquitoes were sucking blood out of my face the whole night and there was lizard poop on my blanket.

1. I had a good chat with my girlfriends on the bed til midnight :)
2. My best friend talked to me while i drifted to sleep beside her
3. The english teacher who came to give us a talk liked my piece of writing
4. My school's teacher actually gave very good tips for physics, for once i felt that he's not that bad after all
5. My buddies and i had a crazy time during aerobics, especially when wei herng's doing it so seriously and manly. XD
6. The sessions were light and we didnt have to go to school on saturday.
7. Everyone was hearing and telling yellow jokes -.-lol
8. School teachers were very nice towards us.
9. I had fun with my buddies learning together
10. Ying xin and i tried to quit fb but ended up leaving posts on each other's wall while sitting next to each other.
11. Shermaine showed me funny photos and we laughed so hard.
12. 3 of us cramped in the small toilet and brushed our teeth together :p
13. Ze chen and chang zhi like always, brought lots of fun just being themselves :D
14. I was 'exposed' by chooi phing! Lol
15. We exchanged shower gel and facial wash we had brought to smell them. XD
16. Okay im beginning to think that we did crappy stuff in camp.

Despite only having 4 hours of sleep and waking up feeling like a dead fish the next morning, i would say that it's not that bad after all. :)

music

2010-09-24T21:30:00.001-07:00

an inspiration from God

your melody is a harmony from heaven
your song is a piece not listened with ears
your touch is a feeling i cannot comprehend
your presence is a shadow i cannot miss

your voice is a sound i cannot put in words
your words are truths i can never deny
your plans are not of a future i can see
your ways can never lead me to a wrong path

yours notes are simple yet deep
my hands are frail yet u hold it
you open my eyes to see more keys
to play more than a song, more than a melody
all i know is that
this is no ordinary music.

Because it's yours
i'll give my all.

Your Touch

2010-09-21T01:46:00.001-07:00

i bowed my head and closed my eyes as i talked to God in my heart. 'what r u doing?', she asked. 'praying', i answered as i smiled. The next question was unexpected. 'can u teach me how to pray?' i raised my head and i nodded without hesistant. 'come over here', i gestured. She walked to my bed and sat in front of me. 'u just have to close ur eyes, and talk to God, He's listening', i explained. Seeming surprised at how simple it is, she didnt know what to do next. So i held her hands, and told her 'let's pray'. Holding her hands, I said a simple prayer, asking God to help us the next day and granting her peace. Then, it ended with 'amen', a sign of agreement. 'Don't worry and get some sleep', i told her and noticed her watered eyes. She just kept quiet and smiled a little. Then, we went back to bed.

'get up and pray for her' i sensed God telling me when i was already in bed. 'what? Why?' 'pray for her' honestly, i was reluctant for i was worried that she wouldnt like it. But i couldn't just sleep on it, and i was sure that God was being serious. So i went to her bed and patted her arm gently. 'hey.. I want to pray for u..' she got up a bit shocked but she let me hold her hands again and shutted her eyelids. The words which came from my mouth wasnt exactly frm myself, it was the holy spirit. I remembered praying 'Lord u created her just the way she is, and she might not know, but show her that she's so special and how precious she is in your eyes. Let her know that u're always there for her no matter what'

That night, i went to bed in tears, so did she. Not tears of sadness though.

Sometimes, there's this indescribable feeling we do not understand which makes us feel more fortunate and loved than anyone else. I do not know how to put those feelings in words. But one thing im sure, God is so real that i can feel his touch. Because He loves me and the people around me so much, im learning to love as much as i can even though im not perfect and neither r u.

'Lord help me to love her although it's not easy. she means a lot to me.'

Love=forgive=forget

Im sorry for all the wrong things i did and said.

written on my face :)

2010-09-15T08:14:00.001-07:00

chris's top 15 favourite expressions (which only includes the mouth)

1. Smile for no reason :)
2. Laugh at lame jokes :D
3. Giggle when she thinks of something weird or funny
4. Grin while reading messages or notes
5. Smirk as she plans a naughty scheme XD
6. Chuckle at an interesting statement
7. Beam when she receives a compliment
8. Purse her lips when she doesn't know the right reaction to give
9. Bite her lower lip when she's thinking hard
10. Pout when people don't listen to what she says :*
11. Frown whilst having a bad mood
12. Puff cheeks when there's nothing else to do
13. Grit her teeth to show that's she's annoyed
14. Gape in a shocking situation.
15. Scowl because of dissatisfaction

of course, everything written on my face cannot possibly be written right here, moreover with words. :) i thank God for giving us mouths that we can show our feelings on our faces, delight or sullen. More importantly,to radiate joy with contagious smiles. So yea, don't be so freaked out when u see me smiling to myself. XD

my kind of guy

2010-09-14T01:36:00.001-07:00

Now, here's what you're
supposed to do, and please do
not spoil the fun. Copy and
paste this into your notes,
delete my answers, type in your
answers. if you a guy- post this as my
kind of girl.. if your a girl- post
it as my kind of boy..

I was really bored, so yea. I did this just for fun :)

1. Do you need him/her to be
good looking?
He doesnt need 2 have the
celebrity look as long as i like
his look (normally guys i like looks good 2 me eventhough
the others strongly disagree
XD)

2. Smart?
Yes he must be SMART but not
proud or the show off kind

3. Preferred age?
Same age or older by a few
years. Maximum age gap: 3

4. Preferred height?
Just needs 2 be taller than me,
which is not a very hard thing to achieve.

5. How about sense of humor?
Yes very good sense of humour!
And He must must must must
must know how 2 make me
laugh. :D just emphasizing coz
it's so important. hehe

6. How about piercings?
No. Those are for me, not him.

7. Accepts you for who you are?
Yes, good or bad, he must love all of me. xD

8. Pink hair?
Ewwww that's so lala

9. Mushy or no?
Might jus suffocate in mushiness, mushy no, romantic yes.

10. Thin or fat?
Err prefer thin but not thinner
than me!

11. Black, Brown or White (skin
color)?
Any wil do but not the black
kind of dark..

12. Long hair or short hair?
Nt too long until he could tie it
up or until he needs a pin. O.O

13. Plastic or metal?
Does this refer to the car he
drives? Lol. Ahahahaha

14. Smells good?
Yea, i Wouldnt want a guy who
smells bad. XD

15. Smoker?
No! What if he puffs smoke in
my face?!

16. Drinker?
A cup or 2 is okay as long as he doesnt get drunk and vomits all
over me. Yuck!

17.Girl/Boy-next-door type?
Uh huh. The Friendly kind.

18. Muscular?
nt necessary

19. Plays piano?
If he does, that would be awesome because we can play duets ,bt if he cnt, i wil play for him :) hehe

20. Plays bass and/or acoustic
guitar?
Yes! Then he could play for me anytime, even during outings!

21. Plays violin?
ummm.. Anythng :)

22. Sings very good?
Don't really need 2 b good,
someone who would sing for
me would be good enough.

23. Vain?
No. be manly!

24. With glasses?
Nt too dorky ones with super
thick glass lens

25. With braces?
Aww i have braces too, how
sweet is that! It's just temporary
anyway so yes i don't mind

26. Shy type?
I dont mind because i can keep talking 2 him. Haha

27. Rebel or good boy/girl?
Goood boy

28. Active or passive?
ACtive!

29. Tight or bomb?
Err can i choose just nice?

30. Singer or dancer?
Prefer singers cause dancers have partners. O.O y arent
there musicians anyway?

31. Stunner?
Nah..

32. Hip hop?
umm whatever.

33. Earrings?
NO i told u they were for me

34. Mr/Ms. count-my-ex-
girlfriends-until-you-drop?
No way,those r flirty guys!

35. Dimples?
That's a good hereditary trait.
lol!

36. Bookworm?
Not too extreme until he hugs
his books wherever he goes 2

37. Mr/Ms. love letter?
Ooh i love love letters. :)

38. Playful?
Hehe yea, then i'll never be bored

39. Flirt?
no.

40. Poem writer?
Yes! Pls write something like
sonnet 18! Haha

41. Serious?
At times when he needs to be,
yes.

42. Campus crush?
Who knows? Lol

43. Painter?
That would be coool. He can
teach me!

44. Religious?
Yes =) A commited christian

45. Someone who likes to tease
people?
Yup! But not ALL THE TIME

46. Computer games geek? Or
internet freak?
no. Wouldnt want a bf who
loves the computer more than his life.

47. Speaks 20 languages?
what if he has got 20 gf's and i can never find out? :p

49. Good kisser?
This doesnt matter -.-

50. loves children??
yes! I love them too :D

Apparently what u want is not what u get most of the time. This would be funny if i read it again after i have a boyfriend. XD why not u guys try too n compare what u wrote to your future partner? It would be interesting. Have fun!

2010-09-12T09:21:00.001-07:00

4 days of holiday left! :O

things i've decided to do
1. Give u time and space :)
2. Enjoy my time just with dad
3. Finish my homework
4. Record a song
5. Spend quiet time with God
6. Sleep early XD
7. BLOG like i used 2
8. Oil-painting!
9. Watch the cinderella cartoon
10. Be optimistic :D

2010-09-06T01:32:00.000-07:00

ello!

my blog is open again! :) maybe some of u are wondering, y lock it in d 1st place? :P I guess i just needed my own space for a while and locking it somehow gave me more privacy. Hehe.

anyway, im still having my break, not entirely a break, but yea, these few days just reducing the time i spent on internet was fulfilling. It did gave me lots of time to really think.

things have changed, i have changed..well a bit? but don't worry, it's in a good way. =)

how? you may wonder.

well, it's hard to explain. but in a way, im much more optimistic now =D

i learned something in church 2day n came up with a conclusion that happiness does nt depend on the arrangement of your life, it simply depends on the arrangement of your mind.

i suddenly remember someone asking me what makes me happy before this, nw 2 think of it, if i were 2 answer again, i would say, everything! That's because i have God with me :)

learning 2 b grateful n learning 2 throw my worries behind.

signing off,

change

2010-09-04T10:26:00.000-07:00

sometimes when it's late like this, when all my faithful listeners are asleep, i wonder who to go to, who to pour out my feelings to. Then only i remember that i have God. Sadly, i haven't realize that i have someone who's always there for me because i was too selfish. God reminded me again and again of who i am, why some things happened in my life, why a few certain people appeared in my life. They are all here for a reason, to make me stronger, to make me tougher. More importantly, to remind me of how good my God is.
No matter day or night, good or bad, He is willing to listen. No matter what, He's always the same. i forgot to spend time, just listening. i forgot to stop, just to let everything come to a halt. i forgot to smile, just feeling His joy.
i need a break so that i can just spend time with the ones i love, with my Father who loves me.
i need a break so that i can remember the ones who were always there for me.
i need a break so that i can think clearly and not to let myself be affected by people.

i need a break, i need a change.

after this, i promise, i will be different.

passion

2010-09-02T09:53:00.000-07:00

i looked into the space ahead of me, 400 meters, i reminded myself. The grass felt dry and sharp, a sensation of heat from beneath the ground warmed my feet. i took a deep breath as i eyed the teacher as he pointed the gun at a round board, before i knew it, the trigger was pulled, the crowds went crazy.

i began to take the first step, continuing with the next. My alternating footsteps gradually accelerated until i moved at a constant pace. I could only hear my own breathing, the air i breathed in felt dry but i did not feel the heat of the scorching sun. in the distance, i heard familiar voices calling out to me. They seemed more excited than me, i stayed focus but i could hear my name echoing in the air.

My mind was blank, all i knew was i needed to keep on running. Each step i took reminded me that i was not staying at the same ground but i was moving forward, nearing the finish line. i felt free, like nothing was able to stop me, like i was able to go as far as i could, nothing to pull me back or to control me, the indescribable feeling i always had whenever i started to run. It was not just about my legs, it was about something more.

i kept my eyes on the grass and the figures of the other athletes in front. "Lord give me strength" i prayed in my heart as i prepared for my sprint. last 100 metres approached, it's time, i told myself. then my legs, as if carried by the wind, started bringing me to a faster speed, slowly overtaking the ones in front. the wind coming in my direction blew my hair backwards, i clutched my fist tighter than ever, i was almost there. i heard shrieks, i heard the name of my house's name being announced, i heard my name more loudly than ever. I was tired, a bit more i thought as i pressed on.

then, i finally passed the line, letting out my last heavy breath. Knowing that my friends were there for me, ready to catch me, i fell. Safe in my friends' arms, they congratulated me. "you ran so fast," they said with wide smiles. i looked at them and gave them the widest grin, i knew that i had something other racers didn't have, i had friends who carried me as my legs become wobbly, friends who massaged my leg because of the awful sore, friends who cheered me on. i had enough =)

running is not just about running, it's a passion.

C for Chris =D

2010-08-27T08:38:00.000-07:00

4 years back, my 2 best friends came up with an idea of describing me using words starting with the letter C.

so it went on like this.

Cheerful Chris!

Cute Chris!

Crazy Chris!!! *evil laughs* good one!

and yes..many more. =)

Words to describe me doesn't all start with the letter C. But here's a list of the adjectives which starts with C. amazingly, most of them are kinda true =D

1. Cute

i guess my personality kinda makes people think I'm cute? perhaps not my appearance, but my reactions, as said by my friends, are funny and in a way cute =) however, cute means ugly but adorable, so yea. =P pretty sounds so much better *hint hint* haha.

2. Crazy
ahh..very crazy!! i did such crazy things that i had never ever thought i could ever do. Let's not get to the examples =P And of course, how can we miss my crazy jokes and laughter =D

3. Creative
i do like to think of new and fresh ideas other people never thought of, but whether I'm creative or not, you be the judge =)

4. Cheeky
aha, yes cheeky like a monkey indeed. evidence=someone wanted to tie me to the pole. i often receive statements like "can you not jump up and down but stay still for a moment?" haha!

5. Cheesy?
sometimes when the mood comes, yea XD i would say cheesy phrases to my friends for fun.

6. Cool!
i know most of you would be shaking your heads right now. but hey, sometimes I'm kinda cool! right???? =D

7. Clever
erm... maybe in some ways. but I'm also stupid in a few ways. So, it's fair enough. =p

8. Chatty
yesssss! especially when I'm with my good friends =) we always have never-ending topics to talk about.

9. Classy?
i hope so! but yea...=( i don't think so

10. Clumsy
mum says, "Chris ah, why you so clumsy one. Hands like legs, legs like hands!"
hahahaha =D oh well, if you know me, you should know how clumsy i am =P

11. Careless
very careless! i always leave things around everywhere and end up losing all my stuff which is a very sad thing. =(

12. Clueless
the very frequent words said are"what?" "huh?" "apa?" when i have no idea what they are talking about. oh all the clueless moments i had =P forgive me for not listening carefully or paying attention when you guys are speaking, that's why i always end up asking, "what did you say?"

13. Crappy
in the morning? yes! maybe it's because i don't have enough rest.

14. Choosy
it depends on the situation =) i'm choosy especially when i'm suppose to choose something to buy until i spend 30 minutes considering which is nicer. or maybe, longer than that until someone eventually breaks down and wails, "chris ah just choose any la!" XD

15. Childish
when many people come telling you that you're very childish then i guess it's true. in fact, no one had ever believed that I've grown more mature when i tell them, "older already, more mature now!" lol.

16. Cheerful
yippee! most of the time i guess =D but of course, i do have my "emo" moments too

17. Competitive
or in other words, it's called "kiasu". i admit that I'm "kiasu" in certain areas =D On the contrary, If it's about something i don't really care about, then i wouldn't care even if i lose. but let's remember that life is not about winning! (this is especially for the people who like to argue with me =P you know who you are)

18. Comic-like/Cartoon-like
it seems to be that I'm always exaggerating my gestures and facial expressions that my friends sensed that i act almost like a cartoon character. i think i learnt this from the television =P and it makes people laugh! hehe.

19. Creepy
if there's something creepy about me, that would be my bad habit of laughing or smiling to myself =O

20. Caring
sometimes i worry that the others will think that I'm being a little too much of a busy-body. But guys, i just care that's why I'm being so long winded sometimes...um...like a grandmother? =P

that's not all =)

C also stands for crown, cinderella, christ.

crown

He places a crown of love and compassion on my head even though I do not deserve it, it's called God's GRACE =)

cinderella

He is the King of heavens and universe. I will always be His princess not matter what. so from an ordinary girl to a princess, im just like my Father's cinderella =)

christ

He lives in me. Jesus came to save us, sacrificing everything just to give us a pure heart that we may reconcile with our heavenly Father. He's my saviour. =)

*just Chris*

i know that words which start with C doesnt end here, so if you have any better suggestions, you're most welcomed to share =D

signing off for now, CC

metamorphosis

2010-08-24T07:49:00.001-07:00

this morning, my friends and i talked about failure and missing chances.

did badly in your exam?
missed a great opportunity to get a great offer?
weren't the chosen one?

yea..all these make us sigh our days away, hoping that maybe we were better, that we were the LUCKY one.

i believe, life doesn't depend on luck. it depends on fate =)
God has a plan for all, when you lose something, God has something better in store.
It doesn't mean that it's the end after you lose something, because you will come to realize that by losing something, you gain something in return, something better =)

so don't hold on to every loss, don't look back to your failure, because only by looking forward, you can breath a new breath.

look at the caterpillar. they need to spend about 14 days in the cocoon.

during the period of 14 days, they could have done something better, maybe eat more leaves, build a home, mate to have more offsprings =P

but no, those 14 days are needed so that something more beautiful can happen.

so that the caterpillar can turn into a beautiful butterfly.

in a way, life is like that too. you need to let go, you need a break, you need to rest, you need to sacrifice, then you'll see the beautiful things unfolding right before your eyes

If you don't let go, you can never have space to accept more blessings or to start a new beginning.

metamorphosis, it's a new breath

however, before you breath, you have to sacrifice 14 days

it's definitely worth it =)

it's not over yet?

2010-08-23T00:06:00.000-07:00

23rd finally arrived after counting down for weeks, everything could finally come to rest for a moment, and everyone could finally let out a breath of relieve.

but it is really over?

nope.

i still remember what pastor victor told us in youth camp last year. He said that most people think that an exam's over after the last paper, but apparently, it's not. It haven't even started =D

The real exam starts when you receive your results. How do you respond? How do you accept your results and what do you do after that?

or more importantly, how was your attitude before, during and after the exam? were you honest during your exam? did you try your best when you're answering your papers? or did you sleep when you had extra time? =P (oops, sounds like me)

so if you think it's over. you're wrong =P

there's still a long way to go. and more importantly, did you get an A in God's report card?
honestly, that was what i was holding onto when all the tips seemed so tempting. im glad i did not let the temptation take over because the most important thing is not scoring an A for all subjects, it's scoring an A+ on God's report card =)

it's just a trial

2010-08-12T03:25:00.000-07:00

5 subjects down, 5 more to go.

i remember telling a few of my friends just a month ago about studying hard from that moment on.
i told them, no more last minute for me.
i told myself, i want to give my best during the trials.
i ended up breaking every promise of mine.

that's why i eventually stopped facebook, and started concentrating.
but it was still too late.

being the person who always did things at the very last minute and was still able to get away with it. i got used to it. i got used to getting things i actually didn't deserve, or that's what i thought.

it seemed like things went well all the time, until i suddenly dropped
only i've come to realize, no matter how many times you've succeeded, you will still fail

without failure, there's no success
but success doesn't mean there's no failure

to be a person who is truly successful is telling yourself that..
it's okay to fail, because failure comes along the way.
it's okay to fail again and again, because you will do better each time
it's okay to drop from the top to the bottom, because you can climb back to the top again
it's okay to tell people you've failed, because it is just a process to reach success

never compare. never say you're not good enough. never give up =)

do not worry about tomorrow, do your best, and God will do the rest
5 subjects down, 5 more to go.

Home alone

2010-08-12T02:50:00.001-07:00

when i woke up on saturday morning.

i walked down the stairs only realizing that the house...

....was empty. (yiaks scary isn't it?)

so i walked into the kitchen and found 2 pieces of paper clipped up, one with my mum's handwriting, another with my dad's

mum like always, reminded me about everything she just reminded me about last night. lock the doors, feed the dogs, feed the fish, bring in the clothes, and about food bla bla bla..
i smiled to myself knowing mum's just being mum, but yeah.. *sigh* im already 17..

dad replied the note i left on the table the night before. At the end of the short message (which i didn't really understand anyway because of his doctor's writing) , he left words he seldom said. =) glad that everything was okay again, i was relieved that i was not too late.

i walked out of the kitchen..

and i see papers taped on doors, everywhere!
beside me, behind me, and in front of me!

"remember to latch doors. UP AND DOWN"

lol...i couldn't help it but sigh again. im already 17 lah.

i checked my handphone and found a message from mum. again, it's a reminder about my lunch, dinner, the clothes bla bla bla.

haih.
my parents probably think i have a limit of one day's memory, like in 101 dates? if i got the title of the movie correct.

so the day went on well, yes i remembered to bring in the clothes and feed the fish.
then it was time to go for tuition. after i had prepared myself to go to my aunt's house to get the bicycle, i found the bicycle outside. =D

dad and mum brought back the bicycle for me =) i didn't have to walk anymore! weeee!
so i cycled my way to the tuition center and i reached safely! praise God!

before i left tuition, my friends being very considerate, asked me to be careful.. lol they know the careless me.
ahh but.. the trip back wasn't that good.
it rained when i wanted to cycle home, so i went shopping in guardian to get stuff my mum asked me to buy. after i was done, it stopped raining! praise God again!

so i hopped on my bicycle and cycled..and cycled..and i almost knocked a motorcyclist coming from another way. we met at the corner! and fortunately he stopped!! or not i would knock into his motorcycle. being a very nice guy, he just smiled sweetly =) and i thought he was going to scold me.

then when i stopped at the traffic lights. it was worse. it was EMBARASSING.

i dropped my sandal when the lights went green...

can you imagine that???? how embarassing was that!! i ended up coming down from the bicycle to pick up my sandal. and the lights.. turn red and i had to wait..again.

p/s: i kept my head low throughout the waiting process

of course, i kept myself safe for the rest of the journey back home. *sigh of relief*

hah, one day.. one day i'll drive myself.

don't worry guys.

i won't knock anything =P

If

2010-07-29T03:58:00.000-07:00

if you dare to shut your eyes and imagine the wildest dream, a dream no one ever dreamt of, a dream no one would ever believed in, or a dream no one would ever dare to dream.

what would it be?

would it be a dream to become a princess? =D

or is it a dream of you standing at the peak of a mountain looking down to the picturesque scenery?

would it be a dream of you stepping into a place like paradise?

or a dream to be with the one you love the most?

if you dare to step out when everyone is hiding away, when things are not right and it needs to be corrected, when it is time to speak out for the weak...

would you do it?

would you be willing to risk it all for someone who is not worth your sacrifice?

would you take it all on your shoulders when it has nothing to do with you?

are you righteous enough?

If you dare to be braver than anyone else. would you choose to take this path?

Sejarah class

2010-07-26T23:06:00.000-07:00

*during sejarah class*

cp: hey let's go sit at the back, it's so hot here
me: okay la.

*runs to the "kopitiam table" behind our class*

cikgu: eh kenapa duduk kat belakang? duduk depan!
me: cikgu, panas la!!
cikgu: saya tak de suara nak cakap kuat, nanti tak dengar?
me: cikgu boleh dengar boleh boleh!
cp: ya cikgu boleh!

*cikgu ignores us and asks wiwi to explain to the whole class about chapter 7*

wiwi: okay kelas, apa negara persekutuan?
*whole class yells different answers*
wiwi: okok.. negara persekutuan ialah..bla bla bla...kuasa eksekutif terletak pada siapa??
whole class: Yang di-Pertuan Agong!
wiwi: badan pelaksana atau eksekutif membuat apa?
cp and i: (shouts from behind) menjalankan kuasa eksekutif mengikut perlembagaan!

*wiwi goes on asking many questions while the whole class amazingly seem very keen to answer her questions*

*comes up with a naughty scheme*

me: wiwi!! saya nak tanya kamu!! siapa 3 orang pegawai kerajaan itu?
wiwi: okok! Setiausaha Kerajaan Negeri, Pegawai Kewangan Negeri dan Penasihat Undang-undang negeri.
me: bagusss!!!
wiwi: okay sekarang jata negara, apakah simbolik empat jalur itu?
whole class: Perak, selangor, negeri sembilan dan pahang!
wiwi: bla bla bla bla... sekarang ada apa soalan lagi?
*cp and i grin to each other*

me: wiwi! nak tanya kenapa guna harimau tak mau guna kambing?
wiwi: kerana lambang keberanian
me: harimau itu jantina apa?
wiwi: saya rasa satu betina satu jantan kutt..* giggles*
cp: macam mana kamu tau???
wiwi: saya tengok bawah dia!!!

*whole class breaks into laughter*
*cp and i almost roll on the floor and laugh* =D

me: tapi macam mana wiwi tengok??
cp: *looks under the page..giggles* macam ni ke??
awiwan: tak tak, saya boleh tengok la *grins*

cikgu: *frowns* okok cukup la.
somebody: wiwi, padi itu untuk apa???
wiwi: saya tak tau la.
cikgu: saya pun tak tau.
another somebody: nak bagi cantik kut.

awiwan: okay sekarang lagu kebangsaan. apa lagu kebangsaan british?
whole class; God save the Queen!
awiwan: siapa yang pilih lagu negaraku?
whole class: Tunku Abdul Rahman yang mengetuai sekumpulan jemaah menteri!
me: nak dengar wiwi nyanyi negaraku!
some other friends: wiwi nyanyi!!
wiwi: aiya tak mau la. *big smile*

*wiwi finishes the whole chapter*
*everyone gives a big clap*
cp and i: wiwi!!! terima kasih cikgu wiwi!!
* whole class follows and yells "terima kasih wiwi"*

never been so energized and hyper during sejarah class =)
5 Arif can be very crazy at times. =D

Church Anniversery

2010-07-26T22:30:00.000-07:00

Yesus

one of the performance by the youths in PGC during the church's 3rd anniversery celebration. it's a very meaningful malay song =)

Singers: Karmen and Zirol

Pianist: Henna

Drummer: Rizo

Guitairist: Naresh

Violinist: Chris

VERSE
Hidup yang kupilih
Mebuatku berarti
Kar’na Yesus Tuhan
Tempat kupercaya dan berharap
Kubuka mataku
Lihat sek’lilingku
Kuharus nyatakan
Kebenaran-Nya yang membebaskan

PRECHORUS
Kar’na kuasa-Mu
Kar’na kehebatan-Mu
Ku dapat lakukan
Perkara Besar
Yang Enkau janjikan

CHORUS
Yesus Kaulah sahabatku
Yesus Kau yang akan s’lalu berada di sisiku
Kau sumber kuatku
Yesus Kaulah sahabatku
Yesus Kau yang tak pernah jemu-jemu di sisiku
Kau sumber kuatku

END
Kau sahabatku
Berada di sisiku
Kau sahabatku selama-lamanya
Kau sahabatku berada di sisiku

take care

2010-07-23T06:39:00.000-07:00

let the music speak =)

not home alone =)

2010-07-09T02:40:00.000-07:00

staying away from home seemed sad at 1st, but then when i got to my aunty's house, it's not so sad after all. in fact, it's fun =)

why?
1. when i get back home, my nieces cries out in excitement "chris gugu(aunty in chinese) is back!"
2. My aunty always cooks the best soup, yum!
3. My niece asks me to check her homework every 5 minutes, im her personal teacher =P
4. I hear voices no matter where i go, crying or yelling they're all sweet =)
5. i get to do my homework in front of the television..and end up watching tv
6. my nieces like to see me draw cartoons for them and they would always exclaim happily "so pretty!" after i finish drawing
7. my cousin sister always asks me to eat more when i have already eaten more than i can take
8. i have no computer to use which is a good thing =) it means that i'll do my homework obediently

yea i know..i came back to use the computer for a while.. i'll go back later =P

9. im not alone in the house =D
10. i have my nieces to make me laugh when they do funny things =D

in short, the stay is once in a while but worth a lot =)

what now by steven curtis chapman

2010-07-07T08:34:00.000-07:00

I saw the face of Jesus in a little orphan girl
She was standing in the corner on the other side of the world
And I heard the voice of Jesus gently whisper to my heart
Didn't you say you wanted to find me?
Well here I am, here you are

So, What now?
What will you do now that you found Me?
What now?
What will you do with this treasure you've found?
I know I may not look like what you expected
But if you remember this is right where I said I would be
You've found me
What now?

And I saw the face of Jesus down on Sixteenth Avenue
He was sleeping in an old car, while his mom went looking for food
And I heard the voice of Jesus gently whisper to my soul
Didn't you say you wanted to know me?
Well here I am, and it's getting cold

So, What now?
What will you do now that you found Me?
What now?
What will you do with this treasure you've found?
I know I may not look like what you expected
But if you remember this is right where I said I would be
You've found me

So, come and know
Come and know, know me now
Come, come and know, know me now
Come and know
Come and know, know me now
Come, come and know, know me now

What will you do now that you found me?
What now?
What will you do with this treasure you've found?
I know I may not look like what you expected
But if you remember this is right where I said I would be
You've found me
What now?
What now?

It's strange but i feel deeply for certain kinds of people, as i ask myself what now? what next? what can i do? i get no answer.
i know, i couldnt just ignore this passion and vision i have in my heart, surely it's there for a reason.

what now?

i don't know.

all i know is..
God has a great plan for me..

whatever it is, let it be..

let Your will be done but not mine oh Lord =)

The Last Song

2010-07-05T08:18:00.000-07:00

The song says it all.